Page 30 of Beautifully Complicated

Head drooped so low his chin practically hits his chest, Kier fishes his phone from his pocket and hands it to me. “Put your information in here. I need to know how to reach you.”

“I don’t understand. You want my number?”

“You’re my assistant, right?”

“Oh.” There’s no hiding the disappointment in my voice. “Yeah.”

I take the device and punch in my number before handing it back to him. When he still doesn’t look at me, I turn to go, stopping short when I hear him speak.

“Aiden.”

“Yes?” My chest fills with hope.

“What’s your last name?”

Aaand now it drops. “Oh. Uh, Sinclair.”

“I don’t see it in here.” Kier’s thumb scrolls over the screen, searching.

“That’s because I put it under Leanbh.” I let myself out before I see him react, since I’m not sure I want to know if he finds that amusing, endearing, or heartless.

Please don’t let it be that last one.

I probably should have put more thought into his reaction before filing my name underbaby,but in my defense, desperation can make you do crazy things, and I’m feeling pretty fucking desperate.

After getting my heart broken the first time, realizing that heartbreak was more like heartburn given that Bennet was never supposed to be my person, and having it broken again by the guy who I’m pretty sure is… Yeah, I’m one keystroke away from snapping.

True, this heartbreak is my own doing because I acted stupidly, but what makes it even worse is that Kier seems to return my feelings, unlike the unrequited crush I had on Bennet. The one I thought was love until my night with Kier.

In the months since Bennet fell for Damien, since I met Kier, I’ve had a lot of time to think. And in that time, I realized my feelings for Bennet could be attributed to the fact that he made me feel seen, much like Kier did. But with Kier, he didn’t just see me at the surface level, he admired me. All of me, including my adventurousnessandmy vulnerability. He said as much when he called me sexy and reassured me that he’d never forget that night.

Clearly, I’ve got a few insecurities if I could believe I was in love with Bennet just because he accepted me for who I am. And if I hadn’t met Kier, I might’ve continued to think that’s what love was. Now I know it’s more than that. Now I know it’s not just accepting but admiring my attributes and my flaws and understanding how they shape me, the way Kier did.

And yeah, maybe it’s premature, ill-advised, or even reckless to use that word to refer to Kier, but I won’t cheapen what happened by calling it a crush or even a one-night-stand. It may have been just the one night, yet it was so much more.

And now, because of my actions, it might never be what it could have been. What it should have been.

Miraculously, I cross campus without seeing anyone I know, and am able to slip into my house and up to my room unseen, holding back the tears until I’m safely locked behind my bedroom door.

Kier Caldwellwantedme.Lookedfor me. And now he probably hates me.

I think I’ve hit a new level of lonely.

Chapter nine

Kier

SEPTEMBER

My finger hovers over the edit button, ready to change the name from Leanbh to Aiden, just like it’s done every day since he came back into my life.

God he’s got balls. Massive ones, if this little stunt is any indication, and part of me wants to strangle him for thinking he’s in a position to act like the bold little lover I took to bed all those months ago. The other part of me wants to applaud him for it, then ravish him.

I’ve been fighting that battle every day for the better part of a month.

I don’t know why I can’t bring myself to edit his information except that regardless of where we stand now, I still think of him as Leanbh. Maybe even more now than I did before.

Working with him has only made him more fascinating to me.

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