“Why watch guys make out unless you’re curious about it?” Liam asks directly, which… is a pretty valid point.
“He says he’s straight, though.”
“Cruz and Jagger thought they were straight, too.” Liam shrugs indifferently. “Then, they found someone that made them realize they weren’t.”
This is all interesting, but it strikes me as odd that Liam would be so forthcoming to me about it. Especially, considering he knows how Bennet feels about me. Or at least, I assume he does, since they’re roommates.
“Why tell me this?”
Liam chews on his lip as he looks me over critically. “Bennet doesn’t hate anyone.”
“He hates me.”
“Does he? Or does he justwant to?”
That trips me up for a second, but only until I remember the way he looked at me when he opened the door. “You heard him yesterday. He said we’d always be rivals.”
“I don't think you hate him either.” Liam cocks his head to the side, assessing, like he can see the truth I’ve only ever admitted to myself. “I’m pretty sure you’re not the type to hate anyone.”
“What are you implying?” I study his face for a hint—a twitch or something to suggest he’s fucking with me—and come up empty.
“Two people who don’t hate anyone but each other. You don’t see the irony there?”
“I feel like we’re talking in circles. What’s the point you’re trying to make?”
“Hate’s a pretty strong emotion for someone you bump into on the field a few times a year.”
“I always thought so,” I start. “I mean, being competitive is one thing, but I don’t hate him. It never made sense why he despises me so much. I’m not sure what I did to make him feel that way but—” I stop short when I catch Liam giving me another pointed look. “Are you saying this is one of those hate is love things?”
“Are you saying it isn’t?”
I mean, I know I’ve crushed hard on Bennet for years, but I think it’s a stretch to say Bennet is in love with me. And I know without a doubt, he’d hate that we’re even having this conversation.
“I think he’ll hate me even more if I answer that.”
“Fair enough.” Liam nods his head thoughtfully. “You understand what I’m saying, though.”
“Yeah, I’m just not sure you’re right.” I want him to be. God knows I do. A chance to pursue something with him ranked as high on the list of reasons to transfer here as getting scouted. It was why I didn’teven consider anywhere else once I knew the Bighorns were interested. But his reaction to my presence hasn’t been inspiring.
“Why’s that?”
“Sometimes hate really is hate.” I shrug like that’s no big deal. Although, I must do a shit job of convincing him since Liam gives me a weak smile in return.
“True.” Liam looks like he has something he wants to add, but he snaps his mouth shut when Aiden steps through the front door. That gesture alone is enough for me to glean that our conversation will stay between us. Which is good, since he's given me a lot to think about.
I was starting to think there was no point in making my move on Bennet, but now… Maybe I need to reconsider. Maybe I just need more time to wear him down.
Bennet
Thank God for small miracles. Instead of training, today was strictly a study session to go over the playbook, so the offense and defense didn’t have much interaction.
That didn’t stop Damien from winking at me when I walked into the room like the smug fuck he is. But I suppose that’s partly my fault since my eyes darted toward the seat he was in during the first practice before I could get control of them.
I have no idea why they did that. My best guess is I subconsciously knew he’d be watching me. Still, it’s an unsettling notion that I knew right where to look, as if I cataloged where he was sitting before. Either way, the idea that I can sense him doesn’t sit well with me, which made it hard to think of anythingbuthim for the entire practice.
I kick at a small clump of snow left over from the last storm as I take my time walking home, hoping the cool air and solitude will calm me down.
Is this what I have to look forward to for the next year? Being constantly distracted and on edge because I’m waiting to see what fuckery Damien comes up with next?