Page 100 of Beautifully Conflicted

For a guy who initially had reservations about gay sex, he’s deliciously insatiable now. It’s something that’s harder to take advantage of when we stay at his place, but skipping Liam’s game to fuck would only earn us the ire of his roommates. They’d guess the real reason we didn’t make it, and who knows how they’ll choose to express their opinions on the matter.

I’ve heard rumors of pillow fights, which doesn’t sound like a punishment to me, but Bennet swears they’re best to avoid.

“Yes, we have to go. We can stay at my place tonight and you can have as many rounds as you can handle.”

“Fine,” he grumbles, although we both know that’s what he really wants.

Insatiable.

Twenty minutes later we’re surrounded by his roommates on the bleachers—all but Aiden who apparently has another study thing to do—cheering for Liam as he scoops up a ground ball. On the surface, that doesn’t seem like it’s a big deal, but he does it one-handed, with a really long stick, and doesn’t break stride.

As soon as he has the ball in the little net thingy, he spins away from another guy that was trying to get the ball and seamlessly passes it to one of his teammates downfield.

I don’t know what constitutes a good play in lacrosse, but I’m impressed, and it seems to confuse the opposing guy who slams his stick on the ground when Aiden eludes him.

“Good clear, Sunshine!” Cruz hollers.

“Sunshine?” I ask him. “That’s your nickname for Liam?”

“You don’t think it fits?” Jagger smirks like he knows something I don’t.

“I mean, Liam’s nice, but he seems more stoic than bubbly and sunshine makes me think of bubbly,” I ramble, hoping I haven’t just offended the boyfriend of one of the first guys in the house to accept me.

“It’s an ironic nickname.” Cruz smiles proudly. “Although, heissunnier than he used to be—Yeah, great pass!” He cheers for Liam.

“He’s dominating today,” Cam says.

“Not just today,” Cruz beams. “He’s always this amazing to watch.”

“Is there pro lacrosse?” I ask, since this is the first time I’ve seen a game, and from my novice eye Liam looks capable of being part of it.

“There is. I’m not sure he’d be a candidate for it though. This is a club team, not D1 or anything, so the competition level isn’t the same,” Cruz explains.

“Could he play D1?” I ask.

“He was going to before getting injured a few years ago and losing his scholarship. That’s how he ended up here. But even if he ended up at a D1 school, I’m not sure he’d go pro. He’d rather be a doctor. He’s playing now because he loves the game.”

“Wow. I don’t know whether to be impressed or depressed that he’s got that much skill and doesn’t want to chase the pro dream,” I muse, since consciously choosing not to go pro if you’ve got the talent is a foreign concept to me.

“That’s what Cam’s doing,” Jagger tells me.

“Seriously? You don’t plan to go pro?” I ask Cam. “Didn’t Bennet just say all three of you are skilled enough to get picked up no matter what?”

“I don’t know if I’m that talented or not, but yeah, I’m planning to hang up the cleats after college,” Cam says.

“Why?” I try not to frown, but it’s nearly impossible.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love the game, but my primary reason for playing is to be with Jagger.” Cam shrugs sheepishly. “It’s something we’ve always done together, but it was never my dream. Besides, if I went pro chances are we’d end up on two different teams, and I don’t want us to be split up.”

“That’s… but… You can hang it up that easily?” I’m balking, but the notion that someone with his talent would willingly give up the game doesn’t make much sense to me.

“Sure. Football’s not the most important thing in my life. Jagger is.”

***

Hours later, snuggled next to Bennet after another vigorous round, Cam’s words are still lingering in my mind. He spoke them with such conviction. Conviction I can understand, considering I transferred to this school to pursue the things that are most important to me. But back then, I put equal weight on football and my feelings for Bennet, and right now, I don’t know if I want them both with the same amount of desire.

That thought makes me somewhat restless in spite of the physical calm from my orgasm.

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