Page 38 of Imagine Me and You

Finally the door opened, and there was Jace. Shirtless and scowling, a blanket wrapped partway around his shoulders. He winced against the light. Hungover. She recognized his hangover posture well.

“Mornin’, Superman,” she said. “Nice cape.”

“What the hell are you doing here, Sam?”

“I came to see you.”

“Why?”

She laced her fingers together, squeezed them tight, tried to ease some of the nerves, the adrenaline that was rushing through her body. “Because. Because I was stupid last night, and while I lay by the fire crying like an infant for half the night, leaving a snot trail on your rug, I realized something.”

“What’s that?” he asked, leaning against the door frame.

She drew in an unsteady breath, releasing her hold on her hands and shaking them out. “I can’t stop you from being everything to me because you already are. I thought the key waskeeping sexy Jace and buddy Jace separate so I couldn’t fall in love with you, but here’s the thing. I loved you without the sex. I have loved you from the moment I met you. But I was afraid you could never love me. So it was safer to forget the attraction part. To lean on your strength, to be your buddy. And I counted on you, and your presence in my life, so much that I never, ever wanted to take a chance of losing it. But everyone in my life has walked away so easily, Jace, so I was afraid of upsetting anything. Afraid you would be like everyone else, not because there’s something wrong with you, but because of me.”

“Samantha,” he said. “That’s not...”

“It wasn’t fair. Because never once have you ever let me down. You’ve never lied to me. You’ve never disappointed me. How dare I question you? You didn’t deserve that.”

“That stuff is hard to shake,” he said. “I know. I’m the king of the bleach bucket, right?”

“Yeah, I know.”

“I was wrong, Sam. To ask so much of you all at once. To walk away when you couldn’t give just what I wanted.”

“You didn’t ask anything of me. You gave. I’m the one that shoved it back at you and asked for different. And you were right—it was all because I was scared.”

“So what is it you want now?”

“Everything.” Her chest burning, a tear sliding down her cheek that she didn’t bother to wipe away. “Your friendship. Your heart. You, all of you. Your love, every kind of love. That everyday friendship love that makes me excited to see you. That deep intense love that makes all the pieces of me ache a little bit. Makes me want to cry over its beauty. The kind of love that makes my body burn for yours. Every emotion.Die Hardand romantic comedies. Every. Damn. Thing.”

He dropped the blanket and walked out of his room on unsteady feet, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her upagainst his body, his breath hot on her neck. “I want it too,” he said against her skin. “The way you kiss me and make me feel like I’m finally home. I want your mess in my house. I want you to take some of the control from me. I want your dog and your dishes in my sink to frustrate me. I want you so that I can feel that kind of happiness only you make me feel. You’re my smile, Sam. You always have been. Until you walked into my life fourteen years ago, I’d forgotten how. And when I walked out last night, I thought I would forget all over again. But now you’re here.” He tilted his head back, and he smiled. “It feels easy now.”

“I love you, Jace.”

“I love you. Forever. No matter what. Do you believe me?”

She nodded. “Yes. I do.”

His heart on the verge of bursting, Jace looked at Sam standing outside of his hotel room door, backlit by the early morning light, snow piled high behind her. She looked like an angel.

“Now why are you standing out there doing a dramatic reenactment of the Little Match Girl?” he asked, his smile widening.

“I thought my best friend might take pity on me. Because I was an idiot, and I hurt him. And he was right about me. I was a coward. But I thought standing in a snowdrift looking pitiful might earn me a little compassion.”

“I’m all out of pity. How about love? The deep, everlasting kind?”

“I would take that.”

“And a place in my house, permanently.”

“You know, Jace, every other time I’ve thought about putting down roots with someone, or, until recently, even when I thought of putting them down alone, I panicked.”

“Are you panicked now?”

She shook her head, hazel eyes glistening with tears. “No. I’m home.”

“You’re at a motel.”