Page 29 of Dangerous Devotion

“Do you prefer if I call you AJ?”

He considered it. “It’s not a name I hear often. My teammates call me Henner or Chickie, a play on the chicken theme.” He took a second strip of the meat. “My momma named me Alexander Henner Jr., but my dad always called me AJ.”

Suddenly, the chicken seemed to stick in his tight throat. He never discussed what joining Blackout cost him—his life. His identity. What was there to say to his teammates when they lived the same thing? They’d all lost their families, but they did it for the love of their country.

May seemed to pick all of this up even though he didn’t utter a word. “You must have a fierce drive to serve your country to give up everything.”

“I do.” He watched her dunk her chicken in the open container of barbecue sauce and nibble at it, wondering if he could actually talk about what sent him into black ops. Then he decided he could.

“I lost a cousin.”

She stopped eating. Her dark eyes burned into his as she waited for him to continue.

“He was killed during a covert mission gone wrong.”

“I’m so sorry, AJ.” Her eyes burned with a little more intensity.

“There was an intelligence failure. Then bureaucratic red tape. I was in a position to access the files, and I did.” He looked down at the box of chicken in his lap. “I shouldn’t have.”

She reached over. He thought she was going to snag a french fry, but she placed her hand over his. “What did you find out?”

“My cousin uncovered a major threat, but his warnings went ignored. When his team was finally sent in to stop it, they’d waited too long and the enemy ambushed them.”

“God. How terrible.”

“I struggled knowing that the people who lay their lives on the line to protect our freedom could end up dead because no one would listen to them. When I got the offer to join Blackout, I knew I could do more good in the world than the average foot soldier.”

“More good than your cousin was able to with his team.”

He nodded, swiping his tongue over his lip and tasting spices. “I don’t have anything holding me back now. I can give every ounce of myself, and use all my skills to fight.”

For a long minute, neither spoke. May just cradled her food in her hand but didn’t continue eating.

The atmosphere had grown too heavy.

To lighten the mood, he huffed out a rough laugh. “Do you have a stomachache already? Maybe I should have brought MREs for us to eat on the road.”

“I’m not sure military rations would be much better.” She offered him a hesitant smile, but the expression in her eyes told him that she knew he was trying to cover the moment by joking around.

She was on to him.

The guys knew he operated this way…but having somebody else in the world understand was new to him, and that ripped off a scab that had formed over the self-inflected wound he acquired the minute he joined Blackout and left his old life, his friends—his family—behind.

He stared at May’s beautiful face. The shifting tide of emotion inside his chest came as a surprise.

So did the idea that after the harsh reality of his life…that somebody in this world…could move him this way.

* * * * *

AJ polished off the biscuit and brushed the crumbs off his lips with a paper napkin. May stole a peek at his profile. His rugged features were arranged in a pleasant expression, but the pain in his voice when he told her about his cousin still echoed inside her.

It made her want to reach out and touch his hand again. Or more, to put her arms around him and draw him against her.

Suddenly, he grabbed the door handle and popped it open.

She sputtered around the sip of soda she’d just taken. God, her stomach really wasn’t feeling good.

He stepped out of the car.