Page 79 of Done Waiting

“Ohmygod!” Maddie shoots to her knees in front of me, bubbles cling to her. “Jagger…” She shakes her head, wrapping her arms around me. “I’m so sorry.” Her tears drip from her face onto my neck.

I squeeze her tighter. “I know, baby girl.” My hand strokes her back.

When she pulls back, she tries to wipe her eyes, but I stop her. Instead, I rain gentle kisses over her face, her hot tears soothing my aching soul.

Maddie doesn’t sit back in the water once I’ve leaned back against the wall. Instead, she sits on her knees in front of me. “How did you get the tattoo and why did you choose that design?”

Grabbing her hand, I thread my fingers around hers. “Jason came over and found me unconscious on the kitchen floor. He was worried when he hadn’t heard from me. I had a phone but kept it hidden. Jason’s parents gave it to me because my father refused to get me one. When he kept texting and I didn’t answer, he rode his bike to my house. He rang the doorbell, but no one answered. Luckily, he looked through the kitchen window and saw me lying on the floor. My dad had left to go to the bar…”

“Fuck, Jagger. I’m sorry, but your father was a sick bastard.”

“I know. Don’t apologize for saying that, Maddie. It’s the truth.”

She sighs, her hand gently swiping the hair from my eyes. “I hate that he hurt you.”

Leaning forward, I give her a gentle kiss. “I know, baby girl. I see it on your face… In your eyes…”

Releasing an exhale, I continue. “Jason called his dad, who rushed over. I regained consciousness on the way to the hospital. John Brandt took good care of me, and once I was released, I stayed with them.”

Grabbing Maddie’s hand, I lift it, kissing the back of it. “I wanted to live with Jason and his family. I was terrified of being put in the foster system and losing the only people who showed me any concern and love. I lied and said it was an accident. I was thirteen years old, and the thought of living with a foster family who may be even crueler than my dad… I couldn’t do it.”

“I understand. But that meant you had to go back with your monster of a father, right?”

I nod. “Yup.” I rub my fingers over her knuckles, my thoughts lost in the past. “My dad neglected or abused me in various forms over the years, but that was one of the worst. Broken bones were one thing… but burning me, then using a knife on the blisters… It was hell, baby girl.”

Tears run down her cheeks as she squeezes my hand. “I can’t imagine, Jagger.”

I give her a brief smile. “I was bullied in school because of the scars on my back, so I kept my shirt on. When I had to change for gym class, I ran into the bathroom and did it there so the kids wouldn’t make fun of me.”

She sighs. “Kids can be so damn cruel.”

“Yes, they can.” I heave out a sigh. “Which leads to my tattoo. My dad was spiraling into his addiction, which was a good thing for me because he often didn’t care or forgot I was supposed to be home. One day, a kid named Brandon McConnell grabbed my shirt in gym class, yanking it off me. I chased him around, trying to get it, but he was faster. He showed everyone my scars, making fun of me for them. When I left school that afternoon, a bunch of guys jumped me, pulling off my shirt and taking pictures and videos of my back while they held me down. It was humiliating.”

“Can I kill them, too?” Maddie asks in a soft voice.

I chuckle, kissing her soft lips. “No, baby girl. Besides, Jason and I ended up taking care of them. He’d been sick that day andwasn’t at school. When I told him, and he saw the social media posts, he went ballistic. That’s when we started working out…” Waving my hand dismissively, I say, “That memory haunted me for years, even after the Brandt’s adopted me. When I was seventeen, I convinced Alicia, my adopted mom, to let me get a tattoo to help cover my scars. It took some convincing, but she agreed, and took me to have it done.”

“Why did you choose that design?”

“Well, my biological mom’s name was Rosalie. Everyone called her Rose. My dad used to give her red roses because she loved them.” I swallow hard, my chest tight from the vulnerability I’ve shown her. “My mom was incredible. When she died in that accident, everything that was good in my world ended with her.” Tears fill my eyes. “My dad’s obsession with my mom was clearly harmful. Because I looked a lot like her, I was punished for it.” Heaving out a long sigh, I say, “The rose symbolizes my mom, the last good thing in my life, dying in the fire. And it reminds me that love burns everything in its path, leaving behind only destruction, and to avoid it at all costs.”

Squeezing my eyes closed, I can’t look at her.

Silence descends over the room. Maddie is so still, I don’t even hear the water in the tub sloshing around from her movements.

My breaths are quick and shallow as I panic. Sweat trickles down my back as thoughts race through my head.My dad fucked me up. My views on relationships and love were jaded because of it, that’s why I’ve never had a girlfriend.

Why did I confess this to her? I should push her away. I should—

My frantic thoughts stop as soon as her hands grip mine. “Jagger. Please, look at me.”

My eyes open, locking on hers. Her hands are on my face, brushing away the tears I didn’t realize were falling.

“Stop it. Whatever you’re thinking… wherever you went. Just… Stay with me. Please.”

I’m stunned as her words wash over me, penetrating my skin. “What… Maddie, what are you saying?”

Tears slipped down her cheeks. “You’re an incredible man. Even more incredible than I could possibly imagine.”

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