Page 140 of Done Waiting

“I never had any intention of leaving you, Jagger. I couldn’t stay awake. The pain was too much.”

“I know.” I tug her against me, pressing a kiss on her head. I’ve never told her how scared I was as I sobbed over, rocking her in my embrace, terrified I’d lost her forever.

With Ryan and Jason huddled around me, Jason laid his phone on the floor, and Abby’s voice screamed through my grief and agony. Following her instructions, I did chest compressions with tears pouring down my face until Jason had to take over.

Ryan delivered on his promise to get a helicopter there. I carried her to the stretcher outside, then got in with her. They weren’t happy, but I promised to stay out of the way and hold her hand. Ryan barked at them that I was going, and they relented.

I held her hand in the helicopter, refusing to let go of her as they worked on her. Once inside the hospital, they stopped me from going any further, prepping her for surgery.

It was touch and go until hours later, the doctor emerged and said she was alive. I hit my knees, sobbing, begging to see her. They finally relented when I grabbed the doctor’s leg, pleading with him.

Her heart stopped beating—twice. I know this because of my dad, a doctor, and Abby, an ER nurse at Falls Creek Hospital, where she was flown. I’ve never told Maddie I lost her twice, barely able to stomach the thought.

Each time her heart stopped beating, I felt it. As agony and despair coursed through me, mine stopped with hers, not wanting to live with her.

Thank God she pulled through and came back to me.

That gleeful moment when I held her hand in mine and felt it twitch, then squeeze, before her long lashes fluttered. Leaning forward, exhausted after days of sitting vigil in the chair beside her bed, waiting for her to wake up. Hope filled me as honey-brown eyes opened, locking with mine, a single whisper from her dry lips. “Jagger.”

Maddie’s voice pulls me from my thoughts. “I’m never leaving you again, and you sure as hell aren’t leaving me.” Her voice is a conspiratorial whisper. “I took stalking lessons from the best, so if you ever try to leave… Well, let’s say it won’t happen. You’remine.”

Laughing again, I tighten my arms around her, always needing to touch her. It’s as though I need to reassure myself that she’s here, that I didn’t lose her.

Pulling back slightly, I look down at her glowing face. “Do I know this stalker who has been giving you lessons?”

“I hope not. You’ll kill him for looking at me.”

Snorting, I kiss the top of her head, biting my cheek to keep from laughing. “Fucking bastard. When I find him, he’s dead.”

She looks up at me with a bemused smile, honey-brown eyes twinkling. “Feel better now?”

“Much.” My hand caresses her porcelain skin. “You always know what I need.”

“Ditto, babe.” She pinches my cheek, her gaze on my dimple. I know how it affects her and use it to my advantage whenever possible.

She steps back and slowly turns, facing my mom’s tombstone again. Lifting the flowers in my hand, I blow out a breath. “I think it’s time I let these go. They belong with her.”

“They do. She’ll love them.”

“At least they aren’t all withered and dead like the last two bouquets.” I grin sheepishly at Maddie before bending down and placing the flowers beside my mom’s tombstone.

With my head bowed, I issue my heartfelt thanks for her granting my wish on the stars.Thank you, Mom. For helping me find Maddie. For giving her back to me. You know how much I need my baby girl. I can’t live without her.

Straightening, my hand automatically reaches for Maddie, knowing exactly where she’ll be without looking.By my side. Always.

“She’d understand why you didn’t come before now. The timing just wasn’t right for you. Now it is.” Maddie’s eyes roam over her tombstone before meeting mine. “I’m certain your mom would understand how hard this is for you.”

Tears are in my eyes as I stare at her name. “She never would have imagined how much my life changed after she died. She’d hate what I’ve become.”

“She’s hate that you are loving, strong, sweet, and tough? I’m sure she’d be hugely disappointed to have a son with those qualities, Jagger.” Maddie’s sarcasm makes me grin.

I shake my head, my face clouding. “I’m talking about the other stuff… What I’ve done.”

“Those things don’t define you, Jagger. Who youareis what counts, not what you’vedone.” She squeezes my hand. “And she’d be damn proud of the man you’ve become. Someone who takes care of those he loves.” She hesitates, her face clouding over. “Someone who does the hard stuff that no one else can.” Her gaze softens, her smile the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. “A man who fiercely protects and defends those he loves.” She squeezes my hand. “I’m fucking proud as hell of you.”

I laugh at her words. “You swear too much.” Winking at her, my face softens as I drink in the woman who is my entire fucking world. “You make me a better man, Maddie.”

“And you make me a better woman, Jagger.” Her smile grows wider. “Isn’t that the point?”

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