Page 111 of Done Waiting

My hand clenches into a fist as I take another drag from my cigarette. “I’d like to wring that bitch’s neck with bare hands. She’s got a fucking amazing daughter, the best person I’ve ever met, andshe’s not worried about her?” Murderous thoughts fill my head, and I imagine tying the Ice Queen up in the town square, lighting her on fire, then burning her and the whole fucking corrupt town to the ground. “I’d be destroyingeverythingif Maddie disappeared like that.”

“How the fuck is her mother not frantic over her whereabouts? Christ, she’s a detective with many resources at her disposal.”

“I don’t know, Jason. Sure, it’s good for me that the Ice Queen isn’t searching for her. But what if I hadn’t intervenedwhen Maddie saw Ben killing that girl? Ben could have stolen Maddie, tortured her, then killed her, and her fucking mother would be completely oblivious.” My jaw is clenched so hard I’m surprised I don’t break any teeth as I stare into the woods surrounding the lake.

“That bitch needs todie.” Jason’s voice is full of rage that it trembles on the last word.

Huffing out a long, low sigh, my thick, emotionally choked voice is full of defeat. “But I can’t.” My shoulders slump. “If I kill the Ice Queen without Maddie’s consent, it will only drive a wedge further between us. And it’s doubtful Maddie would want me to kill her. She has too big of a heart.”

The fight we just had circulates through my mind, over and over again. My lips quiver, and tears slide down my face. “I hate that there’s a distance between us. I should have come clean before now.”

“What good would that have done, Jagger? She still would’ve been hurt. And she didn’t know and trust you then like she does now. The two of you would have imploded before you ever got started.”

“We’re imploding now.” I wipe the tears from my eyes. The pain is so intense inside my chest I feel like I’m having a damn heart attack. “I just… I fucking love her so much, Jason. I hate that I hurt her. And I don’t feel any better than Ben. When she compared me to him, saying I’m no better…” I feel like shit. Like all the awful things I’d be called over the years, especially by my father. Conjuring him up inside my head, his voice yelling at me that I’m “worthless” flows through my head. My hand grips my hair, tugging at my scalp.

“I know it feels bad right now, Jagger. But the two of you will work it out.”

I huff out a breath. “I don’t know, Jason.” Tears fall from my eyes as I lift my head, my eyes unfocused. Finishing mycigarette, I put it out beneath the toe of my sneaker, my heart feeling like the crushed cigarette butt beneath my shoe. “She hates me.”

Jason’s voice is firm. “Maddie doesn’t hate you. She’s just angry and upset.”

“He’s right.” Maddie’s soft voice comes from behind me. I spin around, startled to find her standing there. She slowly approaches me, her bare feet carrying her across the deck. “Jason’s right. I’m upset. But I don’t hate you.” Her lips tremble, sorrow darkening her honey orbs. “I couldneverhate you. You mean too much to me.”

“Hi, Maddie,” Jason yells, his words rushed. “Jagger, I’m hanging up. Talk to your woman.” The line goes dead before I can respond.

She stops in front of me, tilting her head. “I came out here when I couldn’t find you inside. I overheard what you said to Jason.”

My voice is a hoarse whisper. “Which part?”

She reaches up, wiping the tears from my face. “Starting with you telling Jason how much you love me. And everything after, including that I’m different from my mom.” Her head lowers to her chest, her voice quiet. Embarrassed. “And that my mom isn’t worried about me.”

My hand automatically reaches for hers, pulling her closer to me. I study her face intently, hating what I see there. “Are you okay? I mean, I know that had to hurt, hearing that.”

She bites her lip, her cheeks red when she looks up at me. There’s a glimmer in her eyes as a small smile pulls her lips up. Her other hand slides up my bare chest, which is exposed since I never bothered zipping up my jacket despite the cold air blowing around me. I was numb to it, too worried about her.

Releasing her lip, her honey orbs are filled with sorrow. “I said horrible things to you earlier that hurt you deeply.” Sheshakes her head in amazement, blonde locks tumbling over her shoulders. “Yet, you’re still worried about me.”

My other hand comes up, cupping her face. “I always worry about you, Maddie. You’re my priority.” I can’t stop inhaling her scent, nor can I stop my eyes from drinking in her beautiful face. It’s stupid how much I missed her when she fled, locking herself in the spare bedroom. The door was like a mountain between us, and I fucking hated it.

I can’t lose her and fight like hell to keep her.

“I’m not going anywhere,” she whispers as if she can read my thoughts. “I hurt you. You hurt me. We’ll work through this. There’s no alternative. I love you too damn much to let anything or anyone come between us.” Her gaze hardens. “That includes Ben. And my fucking Ice Queen mother.”

I can’t help the smile that splits my face. “You just used my nickname for your mom.”

She grins, a laugh blooming from her chest. “It’s fitting. She is a fucking Ice Queen.”

“Yes, she is.” I slide my hand into the fall of her hair. “Can I hug—”

Her hand slides from my chest to the back of my neck as she throws herself against me, her other hand leaving mine as she wraps it around me. I hold her, one arm pressed against her lower back, the other tangled in her blonde hair, relieved tears filling my eyes.

“I love you so damn much, Jagger. And I’m sorry for what happened inside.”

I bury my face in her hair, squeezing her tighter. “I love you with all of me, baby girl. I’m sorry, too.”

She trembles in my arms, her fingers stroking the back of my neck. “I love it when you call me baby girl. It makes me feel like things are going to be okay.”

“You’realwaysmy baby girl.” Pulling back slightly, I smile at her. “We love each other too much to not fight for us. As long as we choose to work through our problems, we’ll be just fine.”

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