Page 30 of Puck Right Off

She’s quiet again before her gaze darts to the house. “I was foolish. We didn’t use a condom. He… I… Well, I told him I had an IUD.”

My shoulders are by my ears.Oh, shit. If she lied, I need to get her the morning-after pill ASAP.

“I know the IUD is effective. I’m not worried about pregnancy,” she snaps, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I slept with the hockey player who was fucking a puck bunny when I arrived. I probably have ten different STDs because I’m stupid and fell for the bullshit story that he hasn’t been with anyone in a year.”

It isn’t bullshit.My hands curl into fists, hating that she doubts me now. I understand why, but I fed her a false narrative to get her to distance herself from me.

She shakes her head, a brittle laugh coming from her. “Yeah, right. I mean, I know he didn’t finish with Janelle, and yeah, he wore a condom with her, but how many others…” Her voice breaks. “I can’t do this.” Her shoulders slump, and I hate that when she lifts her face, the light reveals silvery tears glistening on her cheeks.

Wiping her cheeks, she exhales a long breath. “Making matters worse, I have to go to their stupid hockey game on Saturday. Mom called me earlier and Robert is insisting we get there early to support Josh.”

She bites her lip, pacing back and forth. When she speaks again, her voice is a soft plea. “Can you come with me to the game?”

More silence ensues before her face lights up. “Tomorrow is amazing. But I have a class and then work.”

She’s quiet, driving me crazy as I wonder what her friend is saying. When she finally speaks, her words cut likea knife. “Yeah, there’s a health center on campus. I’ll get tested, and then we can hang out.”

Irritation causes my hands to curl into fists. Idon’thave an STD. I barely fucked Janelle, and I used a condom. After Tamara and I broke up, I had one brief fling where I used protection, but it was apparent she wanted a relationship, and there was no way I could do that. I broke it off, went to the health center, and got tested. I received a clean bill of health and have been celibate until Janelle and Jordyn.

The sadness in her voice pulls me from my thoughts. “I’m such a fucking idiot.” Her chin and lips wobble before tears slide down her cheeks again. “I thought Tristan really liked me, Chelsea. He said I was special, and I believed him. He probably says that to everyone…” She clamps a hand over her mouth, unable to continue.

My heart twists and shatters into pieces inside my chest as I watch her.You are special. I never considered coming inside a woman without protection until you.

“I know. You’re right. It’s just… I haven’t been told I’m special by any man since my dad died. And the way he said it, he seemed so sincere.”

Fuck.My mouth is hanging open as I stare at her.Her dad is dead?Josh never mentioned that. What happened to him? When did he die?

But I can’t ask her those questions.I have no right. No claim over her…My limbs shake, and it spreads until my entire body is vibrating.I want to claim her. Hell, I’m fucking desperate for her to be mine, despite the promise I made.

I feel like shit as she quietly cries. “I know, Chelsea. Since my dad died, I’ve built walls around myself, keeping others out. As soon as I found a man I thought was different, I let them down. Now I’m hurting while he’s probably in his room, thinking about banging that slut Janelle in the ass.” Thehumiliation and hurt roll off her in waves that wash over me, making me feel like utter shit.

God, I’m a fucking asshole. I never wanted to hurt her.

“I know, Chelsea. I just… Well, it doesn’t matter how foolish and used I feel.” She heaves out a long sigh. “I need to change the subject. This is too much.” Taking a deep breath, she blows it out. “Has anything strange been happening there? Any more details about Lucas? Is he still in the facility?”

She’s quiet, her brows furrowed as she paces a few feet from me. “I’m glad you’re coming here tomorrow. I’ll feel better when I see you.” She turns and heads to the door, so close to me. I remain perfectly still, holding my breath as she says, “Love you, too.”

She ends the call and heads inside without noticing me.

Exhaling a long, mournful sigh, the sad reality isn’t lost on me. Once again, I’m alone in the darkness with my despair.

Sweat runsin rivulets down my chest as I bolt upright in my bed, my chest heaving. My wild eyes search the room, reality sinking in.It was only a nightmare.

The haunting images of my parents and sister’s charred bodies dissipate. Only this time, Jordyn was with them. The haunted look in her eyes before the flames engulfed?—

No!I cut the thought off and swung my legs over the side of the bed.

Running a hand through my hair, I pace the floor, trying to forget the horrific dream that makes me wish I could climb out of my own damn skin.

My breathing is ragged, and my pulse pounds in my ears. I grab a bottle of water from the mini fridge in my room, slurping it down before I toss the empty plastic bottle in the trash. I feel marginally better.

Exiting my bedroom to use the restroom and splash water on my face, I stop and stare at her closed door. I tiptoe to it, pressing my ear against the wood. I listen for a few beats before turning the handle and opening the door.

I need to make sure she’s okay.

Stepping inside her room, I quietly close the door behind me. I reach the foot of her bed, staring down at her. The moonlight filtering through her window gives her a silvery glow, making her appear otherworldly. She’s curled on her side, long lashes resting on her flushed cheek. She steadily breathes in and out, and I breathe with her, feeling my chest fully expand and contract from being near her.

She’s a fucking angel. I don’t deserve her.

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