Page 54 of Incipient

I felt like a fly caught in a spiderweb. I wasn’t sure whether to lie or tell the truth, though something told me I’d be in trouble either way. But there was only so much running from the truth you could do before it all caught up to you. And I was so sick of running; sick of constantly lying to him about everything.

“It was at first,” I admitted, trying out the whole truth thing for once.

He considered it. “But not after?”

“Not after.” My cheeks warmed as the memory of the kiss invaded into my mind.

He dipped his head in a slow nod, absorbing it. “I can work with that.”

“You can work with that?” I quirked my brow at him, half laughing. “What does that even mean?”

“It means I’m going to kiss you again,” he said, his voice as smooth and even as melted chocolate. The air sizzled with energy as he took a small step toward me.

“Wait,” I squeaked, practically choking on the word as it came out. “You can’t do that.Wecan’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“Because…it’s…and you’re…”Zero sense had been made.

“Then tell me to back off,” he said calmly as he reached up and brushed my cheek with his thumb. “If that’s what you really want, tell me to stop touching you and I will.”

I met his gaze and sighed as the humming sensation intensified between us. His eyes were dancing across my face, taking in all of my features as though desperate to commit them to memory all over again.

The way he looked at me…it was the same way he'd always looked at me. Like I was a prized painting that needed to be admired—worshipped. It made my head spin, and my knees go weak.

“Do you want me to stop, Jemma?” he asked as he stepped closer to me, his legs brushing up against my own and sending my heart into a complete tailspin. There wasn’t even a sliver of space between us and somehow, it still didn’t feel close enough. Apparently, I wouldn’t be satisfied until he was completely covering my body with his.

And therein lay the problem.

Becausethatwas precisely the opposite of what I wassupposedto be doing with Trace. I was supposed to be telling him to stop; I was supposed to be keeping him at an arm’s distance. Protecting him. Looking out for him.

Not touching him…

Not loving him…

Not kissing him…

But that wasn’t what Iwantedto do.

What I wanted was to forget everything around us and just kiss melt into him without fear of repercussion. To go back to the beginning and start all over again. I wanted my old life back—my best-friend, my boyfriend, the normalcy I'd taken for granted all those years ago. I wanted to sleep deeply and peacefully again. I wanted to wake up and feel happy with nowhere to go and nothing to do, and I wanted to feel safe and loved again...the way I did when I was with Trace. For it to be just me and him with no ticking clocks and nothing stalking us from the shadows.

But none of that was possible, and I knew that.

Everything was different now. Ruined and rapidly falling apart. And yet, I couldn't bring myself to say the words I knew would protect us both. Because I wanted him. So. Fucking. Much.

He flattened his palms on the counter, caging me in as he slowly canted his head.

It was the perfect opportunity to tell him to stop. That this was a bad idea. That we needed to stay as far away from each other as humanely possible. But all I could do was stare at those bow-shaped lips that begged for my attention and then sigh as he wet his lips and stopped just a fraction of an inch away from my mouth.

His minty breath mixed with my own, filling my head with bad thoughts and pheromones.

The ball was in my court. He was making it clear that I held all the cards now. Finish it or stop it. Make a move or end this. I had all the power, and what did I do with it?

I did the unthinkable, that’s what. I did the absolute worst thing I could have ever done. I didn't tell him to back off, or fuck off, or even to take a cold shower. I didn't put space between us and explain that this was a bad time and a bad idea all together. Nope. I didn't do any of those things.

Instead, I buried my hands into his hair and pulled his mouth to mine so quickly and fiercely that one could only conclude that I was absolutely and utterly starving…

For his mouth.

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