Page 78 of Someone Like You

‘Maybe. That’s wrong, though, isn’t it?’

‘Gaby, I can’t tell you what to do – and neither can the agency. Our decision was based on whatwewould do – or in this case, wouldn’t do. We’ve decided to see how the match with Julia pans out, but you aren’t bound by that decision. You’re not beholden to us.’

‘But is it the right thing to do? Let something happen with Raff – if it comes to that, I mean.’

‘Only you can know that.’

‘Okay,’ she says, her tone betraying her disappointment in my response.

I’m very familiar with this specific brand of hope, having had many patients over the years who sought my ‘permission’ to do one thing or another. Only I am not here to dole out permission. Gaby isn’t my client. She’s only informally connected to this case, and if she wants to make a play for Raff, then I can’t stop her. Actually, I wouldn’ttryto stop her, but I’m also not going to tell her to go for it outright. That would be overstepping.

‘What did Freya say?’ I ask instead.

‘She’s freaking out. She even asked her parents if Raff could go to Sweden with them.’

Yikes – that’s a big ask for Freya. From what she’s told me, her family prefer to keep to themselves. Shemustbe freaking out, and I sympathise with her. She only wanted to do something nice for Raff and now her two closest friends are embroiled in a love triangle. There’s no way she would have seen that coming.

‘But he’s not going to Sweden?’ I ask to be sure.

‘No. He’s definitely coming home with me. But, Poppy, he’s seeing Julia tomorrow. They’ve got a date. And we’re not leaving for Seattle until the end of next week. What if he sees her every day between now and then?’

‘He might, and you need to be prepared for that. You and Freya have both mentioned how fast he moves once he’s interested in someone.’

‘Yeah.’ She’s quiet for a moment. ‘I feel sick when I think of them together,’ she says, her voice strangled.

‘That’s understandable. Look, I can’t tell you what to do, but I will say this: you love Raff – as a friend, I mean – and you want him to be happy, right?’

‘Of course.’

‘So, if you see that he’s happy with Julia, then?—’

‘Then I should leave well enough alone,’ she says, talking over me, her voice steeped in sadness.

‘Something like that – though much harder to do when you’re staying under the same roof.’

‘Yeah… Oh god, this is a huge mistake, isn’t it?’

‘It’s not an ideal situation, no, but you’re being a good friend ensuring that Raff’s not alone for Christmas. You’ve put him and his feelings before yours. But your feelings matter too, so do what you can to safeguard your heart.’

She makes a sound, but I can’t tell if it’s a cough or a laugh or a little of both. ‘Freya basically said the same thing,’ she says.

‘Well, Freya’s smart – like I am,’ I say, making her chuckle. ‘Andshe cares about you.Bothof you.’

‘Yeah.’ She’s quiet for a second. ‘Hey, Poppy, if I need any advice or just to talk…’

‘You mean while you’re in America?’ I ask.

‘Yeah.’

‘You can message me – or call. I can’t promise advice – especially if it goes against the agency’s stance – but I can be a friendly ear if you’re not comfortable talking to Freya.’

She exhales noisily. ‘Thanks. I can’t ask for any more than that.’

‘You’re welcome. Hey, I should chuff off – I’m at my friends’ place.’

‘Sorry again about intruding on your evening.’

‘It’s completely fine. Look, whatever happens in Seattle, do your best to keep Raff’s happiness in mind, but also be true to yourself. If those are mutually exclusive, do what you think is right in the moment.’

---