Page 104 of Someone Like You

Mom looks between Issy and Monica, then at me. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t realise I was doing that. I’ll…’ She lifts both hands, then lowers them as she exhales loudly, indicating she will chill. I fall onto an armchair, relieved but also suddenly exhausted.

‘Can I just ask one thing?’ says Mom.

‘Mom!’ chides Issy.

Mom ignores her, fixing me with an intense look. ‘How will you know he doesn’t reciprocate your feelings if you don’t tell him how you feel?’

‘I don’t. But even if I wanted to, I’m not supposed to tell him.’

‘What?’ Mom is obviously bamboozled. ‘What do you mean, you’re not supposed to?’

‘Does this have anything to do with the matchmaker?’ asks Issy.

‘What matchmaker?’ asks Mom, her eyes getting even bigger.

‘If we weren’t having Dick’s for dinner, I’d be making popcorn,’ quips Monica, her eyes alight with intrigue.

I heave out a sigh and explain about the Ever After Agency and Raff’s case, concluding with, ‘So, I need to see how it goes with Julia. And that’s that,’ I add as an afterthought – more for myself than the others.

‘That’s that?’ asks Mom, peeved. ‘I don’t accept that explanation, Gaby. What if he’s secretly been in love with you all this time but he has no idea how you feel, and he ends up with Julia by default?’

‘Yes, Mom, that is exactly what is eating me up inside. But I’m in a bind here. Because if he doesn’t have feelings for me – hidden or otherwise – then I could fuck up our entire friendship.’

She presses her lips together, a frown settling on her face. But then her expression softens, and she offers a weak smile of concession. ‘Okay, Gaby. I’m sure you know what’s best. But sharing a room…’

Before we can go downthatrabbit hole, Issy’s phone rings loudly. We all look at her and every muscle in her body tenses.

‘That’s Jon’s ringtone,’ she says hoarsely.

‘Do you want some privacy?’ asks Mom, rising from her chair.

Issy forcefully shakes her head. ‘I’m not answering.’

The four of us are silent as we wait out the ringtone and I study Issy’s tortured expression the entire time. Today, she’s been her old self – joking around, poking her nose into my business, chatting with Raff, but it’s all been an act.

She’s really hurting. And I didn’t see it. Not only have I been a shitty friend to Raff, I’m also a shitty sister.

I go to Issy, kneeling in front of her chair, and enclose her in a tight hug. She starts weeping and the only sound for some time is her sobs. When they diminish, I keep my arms around her, but draw back slightly and look to Mom.

Her lips have disappeared between her teeth and silent tears roll down her face. It must be incredibly painful for her to see Issy like this.

‘Sorry,’ says Issy through her tears.

‘You don’t have anything to be sorry for,’ I tell her, something echoed by Mom and Monica.

‘I was feeling so much better today,’ she says, looking up at me with her red-rimmed eyes. ‘I told myself, “This is for the best.” I mean, it hasn’t been good with Jon foryears, so…’ She shrugs.

Years?I think. My sister’s been unhappy in her marriage to Douchebag foryears? God, I never want to end up in that situation.

She wipes under her eyes with her fingertips, and I scout around for tissues. Monica rushes over with a box and I offer it to Issy. She takes three and noisily blows her nose.

‘Hun,’ says Mom with a sniff, ‘we can talk about it some more if you want? Should we go upstairs?’

Issy nods, then bites her lower lip like she used to do when shewas a little kid. ‘Thanks, Mom.’ She wipes her nose again. ‘Oh,’ she says, as if something’s just come to her. ‘But what about Dick’s? I want Dick’s.’

A heavy pause hangs in the air, and I press my hand to my mouth to stop myself laughing. Issy breaks first, and when Dad and Raff arrive home, they’re met with four women laughing so hard, weallhave tears in our eyes.

‘Gabs?’ whispers Raff. ‘Are you awake?’