Page 96 of The One That I Want

‘I’m in the loo,’ she replies, her voice muffled by the bathroom door.

I raise myself onto my elbows. ‘How long have I been talking to myself?’ I yell.

‘Dunno,’ she shouts back. ‘No more than usual.’

I snigger. ‘Probably time to stop moaning, anyway,’ I tell myself.

Tiggy returns, wiping her wet palms down the front of her jeans, leaving damp patches. ‘I’m starving. Can we order in?’

‘Course. Order what you like but don’t go mad – I’m not really hungry.’ I resume my silent-movie-star position on the sofa while Tiggy orders us dinner.

‘Right, that’s sorted,’ she says. ‘Now back to you. It’s shit you’ve spent weeks pining over a bloke you don’t actually fancy. And the work stuff… Well, there was no way you could have seen a mole coming, so that’s shit too. I mean, what kind ofperson would deliberately sabotage your online mag? What a cockwomble! Or cockwomblette – I suppose the jury’s still out.’

‘Exactly.’

‘That’s another reason I love working solo: no cockwomblery from co-workers!’ she declares. Ordinarily, I’d laugh at her silliness, but I don’t have it in me, and she must realise. ‘I really am sorry – it’s proper shit. All of it.’

‘Thanks,’ I say. I roll onto my side and prop my head on my hand.

‘Does it actually help me saying that?’

‘That everything’s gone to shit?’

She nods.

‘A little. I’m just feeling sorry for myself. Ireallythought Harrison was going to be a good fit, you know?’

‘Okay, we’re back on the bloke.’

‘Sorry, jumping around a bit – my mouth following my brain.’

‘Sooo… now thatyou’renot going to date Harrison, canI?—’

‘No!’

She cackles with laughter. ‘I was just having a laugh, you muppet. You’ve started wallowing, which is becoming extremely boring.’

I snigger despite myself. ‘What did you order, by the way?’

‘I thought you weren’t hungry.’

‘Humour me.’

‘Pizza.’

‘Hmm. Actually, that sounds g—’ My phone interrupts me with a notification of an incoming message. Tiggy scoops it up from the other end of the coffee table and tosses it to me. ‘Ow,’ I say, rubbing my boob where it landed.

‘Oops.’ She grimaces at me. ‘Sorry.’

Still rubbing my boob, I check my phone and immediately sit up, staring at the screen.

‘Ooh, is it Harrison?’ she asks, sitting up and craning her neck to see.

I shake my head. ‘No – Ewan.’

I read the message.

Hope you’ve had a lovely weekend. Fancy dinner tomorrow or Tuesday?

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