Page 88 of The One That I Want

‘Of course!’

‘Well, you’re accomplished, we have similar life goals, and you’reverypretty,’ he states matter-of-factly.

‘Oh, well, thank you.’

He sends a smile across the table, then sops up the sauce from his starter with a chunk of bread and pops it into his mouth.

But suddenly, I’m no longer hungry, and I set my fork on my plate. I’m not sure what I expected him to say. I also don’t know why I feel disappointed by such a flattering description.

Maybe having my entire character – every attribute, hope, fear, and ability – reduced to three short statements – sorry,twostatements, as the third was about my looks – is a reminder of how artificial this process is. Howsuperficial it is. Harrison has (likely unintentionally) turned me into a pull quote.

But isn’t that what I’ve been doing with my ‘Dating Horrors’ subjects – and even with Harrison? Reducing them to the juiciest titbits?

Harrison Reed: tall, beefy, and handsome; voice like treacle being poured over granite; dedicated music teacher; eager to be a husband and father; loves to travel; and occasionally puts his foot in his mouth.

Most of that I got from reading a two-page biography, and other than his tendency to say inappropriate things (like I do), the rest I’d filled in with my imagination. And I’ve been anticipating this for so long, it never occurred to me that with everything we have in common, there could be a deal-breaker.

And never in a millionyearswould I have guessed that the deal-breaker was my own romanticism. I don’t just want to be in a relationship and have a baby with someone I share common interests with.

I want to fall in love. Head over heels in love.

And I certainly don’t want someone perusing the details of my life like they’re reading from a catalogue. No, I need to put an end to this whole affair (so to speak).

My appetite abandons me entirely and my stomach roils as I long for a time machine so I can jump ahead a couple of hours. I want to be snuggled in my bed, messaging Tiggy and hoping she’ll reply between rounds of her threesome. Assuming there are ‘rounds’ in threesomes. I wouldn’t know.

‘So, what’s on for the rest of the weekend, then?’ Harrison asks as the waiter tops up our wine.

And so the rest of dinner goes: making small talk and me taking micro-sips of wine and picking at my food. Now I’m glad Ididn’torder dessert.

Less than an hour later, we’re on the footpath waiting for my Uber to arrive. I offered to drop him off then continue home but (thankfully) he lives in Wood Green, which is in the opposite direction.

A Vauxhall Crossland pulls up outside the restaurant. ‘This is me,’ I say.

‘It was really lovely to meet you, Greta.’

‘Lovely to meet you too,’ I say, smiling up at him. He leans down to kiss my cheek – a quick peck – and I climb into the car. I wave as the car drives off, and so does he, and then I rest heavily against the seat, realising that neither of us mentioned a second date.

‘Nice dinner?’ asks the driver.

‘Er, yes, thanks,’ I reply, hoping he’s not chatty.

He doesn’t say anything the rest of the ride home as I type out perhaps the longest message ever to Tiggy.

I am just about to leave my flat to meet Tiggy for lunch when my phone chimes with a message.

‘Elizabeth, if you’re cancelling on me…’ I mutter, but it’s Anjali:

Can you call me asap?

I’ve worked with Anjali for nearly twelve years, and she’s only ever asked to speak to me on a Sunday once before. An unexpected development in a celebrity court case had been leaked, and it would have undermined an entire article that was due to go to print the following day. We rallied – re-writing, copy editing, and proofing the article – then dealt with the fallout from the production team, who were (very) cross about being called in on a Sunday. We barely made the deadline in the wee hours of the Monday morning.

I send off a short message to Tiggy telling her I’ll be late and call Anjali.

‘Greta, thanks for calling straight away,’ she answers.

‘What’s going on? Are you okay?’

‘I’m all right, yes, but I’ve just learnt something rather disturbing.’

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