Page 83 of Shout Out To My Ex

‘Fucker,’ he says, hitting the ‘R’ sound hard.

‘Total fucker,’ I agree. ‘Utter tosspot fucking arsehole bastard.’

Leo chuckles and I turn and catch his eye.

‘You have quite the potty mouth, Miss Bliss.’

‘I can swear like a longshoreman on command,’ I reply.

He smiles at that, his eyes creasing at the corners, and I look away. Having him this close to me, looking at me like that… I can’t bear it.

I wander over to the fabric bolts and crane my neck, gazing up at the top shelf. I look for a ladder, and tucked away in the corner is the kind found in bookshops or libraries, one on rails.

‘I have workroom envy,’ I say, turning back to him.

He gives me a tight-lipped smile. ‘An advantage of being backed by my sister.’

‘Oh, Brandy invested inLorenzo?’

‘Yep. She says it’s payment for keeping her seat warm all those years.’

‘Seems fair. Plus, she believes in you – she was so proud when I talked to her in Paris.’ He tilts his head from side to side, clearly unconvinced.

So, I’m not the only one who suffers from imposter syndrome. Perhaps we can unpack that together – but another time.

‘So, where does Ser fit in? How didyouget connected with… with… I’m sorry, I’m trying to find a way to describe her that isn’t mean or rude.’

‘She’s my mom’s best friend – they were roommates in college. I grew up calling her Aunt Serena. Actually, I still call her that.’

I laugh, nodding as I absorb this new information. ‘Okay, all right… So she took you on as a client as what, nepotism once removed?’

‘Hey!’ he says with a grin. ‘She didn’thaveto. But I reckon she and Mom got to talking around the time Brandy was finishing college and, essentially, they decided for me. I’d move to New York and get to work on my designs and when I was ready, Aunt Serena would launch my label. She’s kind of a big deal in the New York PR scene, so…’

‘Wait. You said they decided for you – why’s that?’

‘I don’t know,’ he says, fidgeting with a tape measure, the only object in the workroom that’s not in its place. ‘I’d lost my mojo. My head was still in the cattle game, I hadn’t designed anything for, well,years, and I just…’ He looks at me. ‘I guess I still had my old man’s voice in my head, telling me that fashion was a worthless pursuit, that I had no talent, thatIwas worthless.’

‘You’re not worthless and you are a wonderful designer. You deserve your successes – no matter how much help you had starting out,’ I say emphatically. ‘I mean, look at me. I wouldn’t be where I am without Cassie. She’s like Brandy – a brilliant business mind –andshe keeps me in check when I get all…’ I flap my hands about to demonstrate ‘wobbly’.

‘It’s awesome that you have her support.’

‘Yes, it is. Just you like you have Brandy.’

‘The major difference is that my family backed me financially.’

‘Well, you’re wrong there. If it weren’t for our nana, there wouldn’t be a Bliss Designs and I’d still be a pattern cutter for a third-tier athleisure-wear label, earning a pittance and being miserable.’

‘Really?’

‘She gave me my inheritance early. That’s how she explained it. She wanted me to follow my dream and what was the point of her sitting on Grandad’s retirement fund until she passed away if she could see her granddaughter succeed as a fashion designer instead?’

‘Wow, that’s… that’s awesome.’

‘It is.Anda lot of pressure to make that happen. So, you see, we are not so different, Leo Jones. We’re both where we are because our families have supported our dreams.’

Something else we could have experienced together had you not disappeared from my life. I dismiss the thought; contemplating a life that could have been is moot now that he’s engaged to someone else.

‘That’s true,’ he says, his eyes narrowing slightly as he regards me. ‘You’re very wise, you know that?’

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