Page 82 of Shout Out To My Ex

‘I suppose that makes sense,’ I concede. ‘Wait – no it doesn’t, because it was your publicist who got us together in the first place, for the collaboration. Well, her and Cassie.’

‘Yes, but that’s not the whole stor?—’

‘So, what are you saying? That Ser doesn’t know we’re working together? Of course she bloody does!’

I push off the wall and start pacing. He remains silent, so I stop, fixing my eyes on him. ‘Are you going to help me understand or not?’ Idon’task the burning question that’s front of mind: are you really in love with Franzia?

‘Yes! I’m trying.’

‘Try harder.’

We scowl at each other as he breathes audibly through his nose, an affectation he’s had ever since I’ve known him. It’s ‘Leo’ for, ‘You are doing my head in.’ Well, good because he’s doing the same to me!

‘Ser is…’ he says, his gaze dropping away.

He struggles to finish the sentence, so I supply, ‘Hard work?’

That makes him smile, his mouth quirking, and he meets my eye again. ‘She’s done a lot for me. Before I started working with her, I…’ I suspect he’s about to reveal something important and resist the urge to interrupt with some smart-arse comment. ‘I was lost, you know? I’d spent six years – no, seven –seven yearsin the cattle industry before I could finally hand over to Brandy.’

‘How do you mean?’

‘The family business. Brandy always wanted it. She has a brilliant mind for business – always has, even from a young age – and I never did. I wanted to be a fashion designer, which to my father was the equivalent of running off to join the circus.’

Pieces of the puzzle start slotting into place – what Brandy said about Leo sacrificing for her, that Lorenzo is a reasonably new label – a newpersona. I still have dozens of questions, but they can wait.

‘My old man… He was the epitome of the word “bastard” – old school, misogynistic… You know why he wanted me to run the company and not Brandy?’

It’s obviously a rhetorical question but I shake my head anyway.

‘Because she was “the daughter” and I was “the son” – line of succession, you see. In his mind, a business that had been in the family five generations – something that had started as a humble ranch with a hundred head of cattle – gets passed down from father to son, not father to daughter.’

‘Oh my god. That’s archaic.’

‘Mmm-hmm. And boy, he made her work for it – both of us. If I hadn’t agreed to run the business while Brandy got her degree, his will stipulated that it would go to his brother and we wouldn’t see a penny.’

‘Wait, not even your mum?’

‘Nope.’

‘Oh.’ So it wasn’t just for Brandy; he sacrificed for his mum as well.

‘And he was socruel… He’d go on these tirades… And how he treated my mom…’ Leo leans against one of the workbenches and crosses his arms, then stares at the floor for some time, his expression pained.

Eventually, he meets my eye and says, ‘This is going to sound awful, but I was glad when he died.’

He doesn’t look away and I know it’s so he can judge my reaction. If I’m appalled by what he’s said, then the connection between us – barely more than a filament, at this stage – will be severed. But I’m not appalled, I’m saddened. What a horrible way to live, hating your father like that and having to sacrifice what you so desperately want.

‘It freed us, his death,’ Leo continues. ‘Even me. It may have forced me to take on something I didn’t want to do, but in a way, I was still free ofhim… you know?’

He blinks back tears, and sniffs and shakes his head, rubbing his hand over his mouth and jaw. ‘Sorry.’

‘No – don’t be.I’msorry. I had no idea how hard it must have been for you.’

We don’t speak for a while, and I look away to give him privacy. Peeking out one of the windows again, I discover a man ‘hiding’ behind a post box. And by ‘hiding’, I mean, ‘boldly leaning against it and smoking while his camera dangles from his neck’. I withdraw from the window so he can’t photographme, then scan the block for more paps. I don’t see any, but that doesn’t mean anything. They mayactuallybe hiding.

I’ve always wanted to be a successful designer – to be invited to show at the most prestigious fashion events and be featured in magazines likeNouveau– but I have never wanted the kind of fame that comes with paparazzi and tabloids.

Leo comes up behind me and peers over my shoulder.

---