Page 38 of Knot that Simple

The rough pads of my thumbs traced her palm, and she shivered and offered me a smile. Filled with renewed want by that smile, I pressed, “Are you afraid of being happy?”

She winced, and I knew I got it right. “More than anything.”

I tugged her even closer until I could reach her waist and have my hands on her. “Tell me.”

“What if I wasn’t made to be happy? What if the universe finds out I’m okay and it ruins it all for us? What if I have to leave you? What if I have to take Alice back home even though we don’t have a home anymore?” She said it all in one breath, a whispered confession ripped right from her chest.

“I would tear apart the fabric of the universe to get you and Alice back.”

It was that simple to me. She was here in front of me, more perfect than possible, and I’d fight for her, even against the universe.

“Why wouldn't the universe want you to be happy, love?” I asked. “Of all the creatures in the world, you must be the most blessed. There’s no way you can walk this Earth and think the universe isn’t proud of its creation.”

She smiled but shook her head. “You’re a smooth talker.”

“I’m not joking,” I pushed, forming a crease between my brows, disturbed she couldn’t see it. “I’m eternally grateful for every second I get to be with you. I can’t understand why you don’t see it.”

“Maybe because I never met my dad, and my mother was always very clear about not wanting me.” She delivered that combined with a self-deprecating laugh that had my heart squeezing at her pain.

“I was never wanted, so why would I be wanted now?” This part was said in a whisper, almost like it slipped unburden past her lips.

“I know a lot about feeling unwanted.”

She arched an eyebrow. “Really?”

I nodded, letting my hands fall from her face. I diverted my eyes, not wanting her to see how desperate I was. I liked to hide behind my easy nature. I wanted to be there for her, not burden her with my insecurities.

“You have to tell me now,” she said, poking me on the ribs. “We can share secrets.”

That was the last thing I wanted to do. I smiled at her, trying to put my mask back in place, but now that she saw what was underneath, she could tell. She shook her head and poked me again.

“Tell me.”

“It doesn’t matter,” I brushed it off.

“It matters to me.”

I groaned. It wasn’t a big deal. I just genuinely disliked feeling of being exposed. I also didn’t want her to think there was a fracture in our pack.

“Look, I know I’m the spare,” I said with a smile, trying to show I didn't mind. “And usually, I’m okay with that, but since you came into our lives…”

“The whole twenty four hours.”

“It's been a lot.” I smirked, and she giggled, though her smile quickly fell flat.

“What do you mean you’re the spare?”

I lifted a shoulder. “Lorcan is the oldest, the protector, the one who taught us both how to fish. I know how to tie a rope because of him. Oisin is mature, and he always knows things before us. I’m just here...”

“No.” Her voice was sharp, cutting me off quickly. “You’re the heart. You are the one who smiled at me at the airport and made me feel at ease. You are the one who made me comfortable for Alice. What are you talking about?”

She looked at me baffled, as if I didn’t know myself.

“Maybe we don’t see ourselves as we should.”

“Maybe,” she agreed.

We looked at each other for a moment, her breathing deep as her heavy breasts brushed against my chest. Gabriela went up on her tiptoes, her warm hands reaching for my shoulders as she captured my lips with her. I tasted her mouth once again, the kiss dissolving all my insecurities one by one, as if she had the power to make me a new man.

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