Page 25 of Knot that Simple

I licked my lips when I polished it off and drank all my water. Alice fired off questions about the boat while we ate, but soon, her eyes started to droop, leaning on me until she fell asleep sitting.

“Here,” Lorcan offered. “I’ll put her to bed.”

He took Alice in his arms and went down the small stairs, disappearing below the deck to where I know they kept a small bed to rest.

“She didn't rest back at the house. She was too excited about the toys,” I explained.

Tadgh gave me the biggest smile I’ve ever seen. “She really liked it, yeah?”

“Of course!” I laughed. “We’ve never been so spoiled. It’s…”

I swallowed the words, feeling self-conscious about how much this meant to me. I wasn't ready to confess my fears just yet; this was so new. I had no right to be this attached to the life they were promising me.

It was also not fair to them. Just like I wanted them to like me for me and not the omega thing, I wanted to like them for them and not the life I could have here. The security was tempting, but I needed more. I needed to be in love.

God, that was ridiculous. I was never exactly a romantic person—at least, I didn't think I was—but since I took the omega test and matched with them, I’d started to grow this thing inside me that wanted to fall in love.

Oisin reached for the cooler once again, raising a chilled white wine bottle. “What do you think?”

“Please,” I said quickly.

Oh, I needed that wine more than ever.

They chuckled, and I rushed to say, “I can’t remember the last time I had wine.”

I never drank because I was always the only one responsible for Alice. What if something happened and I needed to drive her to the hospital?

Oisin served me a large glass, and by the time Lorcan was back, they had glasses for everyone.

“Is she okay?” I asked him.

He nodded. “She woke up for a second, but was more than happy to go back to sleep. What does…hm, baleia mean?”

I giggled at his pronunciation. “Whale. She really wants to see the whales.”

He dipped his chin. “We’ll bring her before summer is over.”

I tried my wine, feeling funny when I felt it sharp behind my molars. I kept drinking while the guys made loose plans for bringing Alice and searching for a whale. They were all serious, trying to make sure not to disappoint her.

“What happens now?” I asked them, cutting through the whale watching plans.

“What do you mean?” Tadgh wanted to know.

I lifted a shoulder. “With us.”

“What do you want to happen?” Oisin asked.

Of course, Oisin would be the one to ask that. I chewed my bottom lip, brushing my hair from my face. “I want it to be easy. I don’t want to feel nervous.”

“Are you nervous?” Lorcan pinned me with a look.

I snorted—he of all people would ask me that.

“Yes, very. I said it before, I don’t know what you all are looking for. I don’t know if I can do that. I…” I sipped from the wine for liquid courage. “It’s been a long time since I had sex.”

Oisin opened his mouth to say something, but Tadgh cut in, “How long?”

“Long,” I spilled the beans. “Three years?”

---