Page 81 of Frozen Flames

I shrug. “Nothing I didn’t already know.”

“Let me guess…he said you should quit?”

I nod, sitting down on the couch. “And that I’m ruining your relationship.”

He chuckles. “Hen always takes Gemma’s side—that’s never going to change. You’re not ruining my relationship, Claire—we both ruined our own relationship. And I know I cheated on her, but trust me, she’s cheating too. You know when someone you used to love is lying to you, okay?”

We both still at his revelation—at the implication.

I don’t know what it means that he used to love her, or if he even means it or if it’s the anger talking. The hope inside my chest is soaring foolishly, ready to fly close to the sun and get burned until it’s reduced to ashes.

“What—what does that mean?” I ask, shocked.

He looks completely crestfallen by his own words, by the truth of them. “I don’t know even know what I mean.”

“Harvey…” I move from the end of the couch until I end up on my knees right in front of his chair.

The next thing I know, our hands are intertwined and we’re staring at each other as if we’re the only thing that matters in this world. His Adam’s apple moves slightly as he looks away for a split second. Then he shakes his head and laughs.

My knees are weak. I can’t even feel them on the floor. All I can focus on are his words and the fact that he might not be in love with Gemma anymore.

“It’s not that easy, to go to someone who’s been there for you through your darkest times and tell them you don’t love them the same way anymore,” he mutters.

I swallow. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“Me neither, honestly.”

I trace his cheek with my forefinger, and he shuts his eyes. The pain is palpable in them when he stares at me again. It hurts me to see him hurting.

“I’ll figure it out, Claire.” His thumb plays with mine while worry overtakes me about whether or not he’s ready to make harsh choices. “She doesn’t deserve this. Even if she’s hurting me too, I don’t want to keep hurting her.”

I’m not at all sure I can trust his words when he looks away. I’m worried he’ll drag this out for as long as I let him.

He kisses my hand, and I get up, knowing the moment is over. He tells me that he’s going to take a nap, that the training tired him out.

I also know he’s torn and doesn’t know what to do about it.

I don’t know what it is about this man that would make me risk my sanity, time, and morals for the chance that we might be together one day.

I know he has a lot to think about, but in a way, so do I.

Everything with Harvey is uncertain.

Yet, at the same time, I revel in his company and his sarcasm and his resilience. This man makes me feel things, he makes me envision alifetogether.

When I leave in the evening, I order takeout to eat in my car in a random parking lot while I try and process everything.

Harvey’s revelations always make me worry, since I never know if he’ll follow through. Tomorrow, he might tell me that he’s going to try to make things work with Gemma again.

But I know, deep down, that no matter how stupid my decision to wait for him might be, I’m willing to make it.

I hope it’ll be worth the wait.

I hope he thinks I’m worth the heartache that he might soon endure.

Harvey

Less Than Two and a Half Years Ago ...

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