Page 62 of Frozen Flames

“Hey…” Harv wheels himself over to me as I put on my coat. “It was nice meeting your sister yesterday, and…I’m sorry about the things I said to you. I know I’m at fault here. I was just…mad at myself.” He scratches the back of his head.

I never expected him to apologize. Especially since I’m not entirely without blame. Here I am, chasing a taken man.

“It’s okay. I’m really sorry too.”

And with that, I leave.

And I feel worse. All I can hope is that he won’t keep stringing me along and he’ll give me an answer soon because both my career and my heart depend on it.

Stupid girl. Why did I have to go and fall for him?

Harvey

Two and a Half Years Ago ...

Everything can change in the blink of an eye.

One minute you’re enjoying your time with the people you love, and the next you’re fighting for your life on a hospital bed.

I close my eyes, and the rain hitting the window of the hospital room brings me back to the night of the accident—the night I became paralyzed and lost my ability to walk.

I wish I could properly put into words how I felt the first time I woke up and couldn’t feel parts of my legs. I felt some sensation from my knee to my foot in one leg, and some higher up in the other leg, but while that might’ve given anyone else hope, it made me want to die in my sleep still.

The surgeries I underwent for decompression of the nerves and vertebrae and to fix my left shoulder were the easy part—the blissful part—being in and out of it afterward due to drugs.

Every time I woke up, my brain aided me in forgetting the trauma. Once I was more aware, the doctor sprung the severity of my prognosis on me.

“Spinal injury…L1 or L2…incomplete damage…testing the extent of your paralysis…control of your arms and torso…some nerve feeling in both legs…”

Essentially, I was paralyzed, but with rehabilitation, I might be able to walk again someday, at least short distances.

The first time I barely registered anything.

The second time I was in denial.

The third time I knew there was no going back.

And that’s when reality set in.

What do you do when you wake up and you’re told that your basic desire as a human being to walk around freely has been stripped from you?

What do you do?

What do youfuckingdo?

Do you thank God for being alive and surviving the accident? Or do you shout at the stars for springing this on you?

So far, I’ve done neither.

I’ve lost count of how many days I’ve been here. But with the constant noise and beeping of the machines, along with the dreaded smell, it’s as if I’ve been here forever.

“Hey, buddy.” I hear Henrik’s voice next to me. “Mom spoke to Dr. Kabera, and you might be out of here in no time, just hang in there.”

I’m exhausted. I feel as if I’ve been deprived of sleep for decades, even though I’ve been out constantly. I can’t shake off the grogginess.

And thirst. Fuck, I’m thirsty.

The only thing I know to be true right now is that I still can’t feel most parts of my legs.