Page 119 of Frozen Flames

He views it as doing a simple favor for Gemma, when in reality he had a choice between her needs and mine—and he chose hers.

For me, that action itself speaks volumes.

I can’t ignore it.

No matter how much I want to.

I even told my mom so, wondering if perhaps I was overreacting, but Audrey just shook her head and stared at my mom as if I haven’t understood anything about men so far.

Maybe I’m being naive, but I don’t think Harvey was intentionally trying to hurt me. I also believe him when he says he wouldn’t go back to her.

It doesn’t matter though. His actions and the words he’s shared with me over the time I’ve known him have stuck with me.

Especially these:I need her.

I didn’t expect him to get over her so fast—they were together for years, and Gemma seriously helped Harv post-accident. I even expected her to text me still regarding his progress and to chime in from time to time, even though she’s been respectful in that regard.

What I didn’t expect was for her to come barging in during our first time having sex, and then tell me to leave.

The fact that he didn’t tell her off on Saturday night hurts.

Because it feels as if I’ll never be able to compete with her.

I know that life and love aren’t a competition, but it’s hard not to look at the situation like that, not when I’ve witnessed her beauty and her quirks for myself as I’ve gotten to know her. I also remember the coldness in the air between Gemma and Harvey. As if I were witnessing the relationship of a nearly divorced couple.

None of that matters though.

This isn’t about his remaining love for her. He warned me that he needed time, and our sleeping together wouldn’t have changed that. But she ruined a special moment between us.

It broke something in me.

I knew I could let go of and forgive many mistakes, but not this one.

He doesn’t even seem to feel any remorse for the way he embarrassed me and ruined our night together and picked Gemma’s side.

Getting to know Harvey has been some of the best moments of my life, but he’s also hurt me a lot.

And I don’t think I can stay on this constant wheel of heartbreak.

Harvey

I barely leave my bed all week.

Henrik stares at me like I’m a lost cause.

It’s Saturday evening, and I haven’t seen Claire since last Saturday.

What should’ve been a monumental night between Claire and me, and my first time having sex in years, was ruined thanks to me.

The first few days, I thought she simply needed space. After Wednesday, I started getting antsy, and nothing would take the edge off. I knew I needed to contact her, or the anxiety would eat me alive.

But she never answered my texts.

She must be really pissed off to go the no-show route. It’s never been like her not to let me know about her days off.

I haven’t trained in a little while, and I can feel my body growing weaker. And unless she comes back, I don’t think I’ll get my strength back by myself.

Henrik forces me out of my room tonight, and I know he’s staying in for my sake. We sit on the couch, and he brings out cans of pop and a bowl of popcorn with too many bags of candies and drops them on the coffee table in front of us.

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