Page 93 of Secret Shifters Next Door

“That’s fine. This place is just great.”

It wasn’t lip service. Something about being back home made me feel safe. Although, I was glad Larry was getting a security system put in. You couldn’t be too careful these days. I’d seen that for myself in more ways than one.

Larry and I had agreed on a three-month lease, with the option to renew if I needed more time. After I signed the lease, Larry let me know it would be several days until the system was installed, so I had to keep bunking with Kellan for the time being.

The night after I signed the lease, we had dinner together—spaghetti and meatballs that Kellan had made. Aiden and I sat side by side on one side of the table, talking about his day. He was getting really worked up about his new baseball season.

“Aunt April, it’s gonna be great. I’m finally old enough for the bigger team. We’re really good. They’ve won, like, so many games. It’s all because of the coach, he’s like a genius. I can’t wait for you to come watch me play.”

He sounded so excited that I couldn’t help getting caught up in his enthusiasm, grinning like a maniac back at him. When I glanced over at Kellan, I noticed he didn’t look happy.

“Yeah,” he grunted. “Great coach. Aiden, buddy, if you’re done, you can go play video games. But only for thirty minutes. Then you need to read until bed. Go on.”

Aiden jumped up, taking his plate to the sink. “Minecraft,” he shouted happily as he ran down the hall.

Kellan glanced at me. “Guess who the coach is.”

Staring back at him dumbly, I shrugged, making an “I don’t know” motion with my hands.

“Steffen fucking James.”

My heart lurched. Steff was Aiden’s coach? I’d already promised to go see him play, which meant I’d have to see Steff. There’d be no way to go watch Aiden’s game without seeing the coach. What would it be like to see Steff again? I’d been preparing myself for the possibility since I’d come back, but now it seemed real. The last time I saw him, he’d ripped my heart out and shredded it to pieces. I’d never truly recovered from the heartbreak. It was partly why I moved away and changed my whole life. That had been when we’d been kids, though. We were adults now, and a lot had changed over the years.

“The guy rolls back into town like he’s hot shit. The damn Little League Association nearly tripped over themselves to get the town legend to coach the top team. I swear, the guy thinks he shits gold,” Kellan said, aggressively stirring his pasta.

Reaching across the table, I put a hand on his forearm. “Kellan, you and Kris really need to let go of this grudge. I do appreciate how much you guys love me, but it’s no use to keep carrying this anger toward him. I’ve moved on with my life, and anything Steff did in the past is that. In the past.” I raised my eyebrows and nodded toward the hallway. “Besides, it won’t be good for Aiden if his daddy is always staring daggers at the coach like he wants to murder him.”

Kellan put his fork down and raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, you’ve got a deal. I promise I will not murder Steffen James. Deal?”

Rolling my eyes, I nodded. We ate for a few more minutes in silence, but I knew I had to get the next shitty sister moment over with. My parents had always been very vague about what had happened between Kellan and Aiden’s mother, and I’d never pressed the issue. They’d told me it would be helpful if I senthim some money now and then because things were rough for him and the boy. And I did, without hesitation. A check every two months or so. And I’d never asked. Now, I felt like a total asshole for not knowing. I needed to. If nothing else, it would help metruly understand Kellan and Aiden’s relationship.

“Kellan? What happened to Aiden’s mother?”

Kellan almost dropped his fork and stopped stirring the spaghetti together. He’d clearly heard me, but it seemed he was trying to think of what to say. He scooped the last bite of food he had onto his fork, ate it, and wiped his lips with a napkin. He stared at me for several seconds. He wasn’t angry, but the expression on his face was so sad that my heart broke for him.

“She was a waitress at the bar,” Kellan began, “We’d started dating maybe two or three years after you left. You wouldn’t have known her. Anyway, we got pretty serious, but she always had a… I don’t know. What’s the word? Wanderlust, I guess? All she could ever think about was getting out of Lilly Valley, and she had all these grand plans to go to New York, Las Vegas, Miami—all the big glitzy cities. She had no intention of ever settling down. I don’t…” He sighed and took a breath. “I really don’t know if I loved her. I think we could have fallen in love, but then she got pregnant. She came to me and told me she wanted an abortion.”

I gasped. I’d known dozens of models and actresses who’d done the same thing to keep their careers from stalling. In my world, it was common. Right or wrong, whichever side of it you stood on, I never judged. But it shocked me to realize that the little boy I’d grown to love already could have easily disappeared from the world before he was even born.

“I begged her, absolutely begged her not to. The moment I found out she was pregnant, it was like I’d found my purpose, you know? I’d kind of been floating through life, watching things go by. It was like,bam, as soon as she told me, everything in mewanted to be a father. It’s what I was born for. Some people are meant to be artists, singers, writers, musicians. Me? I was born to be that little guy’s father, and I knew it the moment I heard. So I begged.

“Eventually she said she would have the baby, but… for a cost. She wanted money to get out of town and start living her life. So, I fucking did it. I told her as soon as the baby was born I’d give her a check. It was all my savings. Literally everything I had, but it was worth it. She had Aiden. Wouldn’t even hold him.” Tears glistened in Kellan’s eyes. “She wouldn’t even hold her baby boy, her own son. The most beautiful thing I’d ever seen in the whole world, and she couldn’t even stomach to look at him. I gave her the check and told her to fuck off. She left the day she was discharged. I haven’t seen or heard from her since.”

If I’d felt like shit before, now I wanted to die. My brother had gone through something that made my stupid little tabloid meltdown seem so damn petty. He’d gone through that and had done a fantastic job raising Aiden. My nephew had grown up his whole life without a mother. And what did I do? Sent a soulless check a few times a year. Sure, the money probably helped, but people needed more than just money. People needed family, and I hadn’t been here. I’d chosen not to be here. I’d chosen to stay in the dark.

“Kellan,” I whispered, barely holding back tears. “I’m sorry. I should have been here. I… I’m such a terrible sister.”

“No, April, you aren’t.”

“I appreciate you saying that, but deep down, we both know it’s true. I can’t fix the past, and I know I’m no substitute for a mother, but I promise you I’ll be a better aunt. I’ll be there for you guys.”

Kellan nodded and sniffed. “Okay, that’s enough depressing shit for one night. Your turn to do the dishes, little sister.”

I did the dishes.

Later in the week, Kellan asked me to pick Aiden up from ball practice. The only bartender scheduled had called out sick and he had to go in since Kris was out of town meeting with a new microbrewery. I’d agreed, even though my butterflies swarmed my stomach. This was it. For the first time in fifteen years, I was probably going to see Steff.

The field was right behind the elementary school. When I walked up from the parking lot, there were at least a dozen kids and two dozen parents milling about. Aiden spotted me and sprinted toward me. He was going a mile a minute, telling me how great practice had been. Even though I did my best to listen and agree with everything he was saying, I could feel someone watching me.

---