Page 182 of Sincerely, Your Enemy

The police sirens are close now, but I’m not sure just how much the police will be able to do for him.

“Then why? Why’d you follow me?” I shout.

His dark eyes plunge into mine, his grip on my wrist loosening as he inhales a shaky breath. I grab his hand and squeeze, refusing to accept what’s happening. Then he whispers six little words I’m afraid will follow me to my grave.

“You hate driving in the rain.”

And he’s right.

I hate driving in the rain.

And when TJ’s hand goes limp in mine, his eyes closing…

I know I always will.

Lacey

“Oli? You okay?” I beat on my little brother’s door for the third time in the past twenty minutes.

I don’t trust that he didn’t go right back to bed after I woke him up an hour ago. Daniel just texted me that he’s on his way over to pick us up, and the apartment he’s renting is no more than fifteen minutes away from our place. There’s no way we’ll be ready to go by the time he pulls up. Not unless I rush these kids along.

“I’m up! Just getting dressed,” Oli says on the other side of his bedroom door, and it soothes my nerves.

Until I remember that Sierra’s still in the shower, and we’re not out of the woods just yet.

I park myself outside of the bathroom and begin pounding on the door. “You need to hurry! Daniel will be here any minute.”

God knows we don’t have time for one of Sierra’s never-ending showers.

“I’m almost done!” she shouts over the sound of the running water.

I release a sigh, admitting defeat and retreating to my bedroom to check my outfit in the mirror one more time.

You’d think I’d be used to this. This isn’t the first time I’ve lost someone I love. So then… why am I overthinking every tiny detail, from the black dress I’m wearing to the style of my hair?

Maybe it’s that I’m not wearing enough makeup. Yeah, that must be it. You can tell that I haven’t slept in days. Not since that night. Not since he bled out in front of me.

There’s something deeply traumatizing about seeing the life spill from your boyfriend’s eyes.

No, no, Lace, don’t go there. You’ve been holding it together so far. Don’t think about it.

TJ’s face flashes in front of my eyes in spite of my best efforts. I see the heartbreak in his smile. Hear the words he said to me before he faded.

“You hate driving in the rain.”

Fuck.

Fuck, I can’t.

It hurts so bad.

You can do it, Lacey. Just get through the day. Just one more day, then you can fall apart when no one’s looking.

My entire body aches from trying to hold back the tears, and I give myself a quick once-over in the mirror.

None of this feels right. I’ve thought about not going, but then again, how could Inotsay goodbye to the man who gave his life to save mine?

You have to go, Lacey. You can’t just bail on TJ’s funeral.

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