Page 61 of Pet Project

“I did enough people-ing today. I don’t think I have two more days of playing nice in me.”

Shiloh gives me a small nod from across the room before he heads upstairs to pack our things. I lean down to kiss the top of my pup’s head before I answer.

“Of course we can go home. Did you want to say goodnight to anyone before we leave?”

He shakes his head, so I keep hold of him as we head to the foyer to get our shoes on. Shiloh meets us there and tells me that he explained everything to Eli so we shouldn’t have to worry about any freak outs in the group chat from the rest of our friends.

The drive home is eerily silent, enough to set my teeth on edge by the time I park in my spot behind the shop. When we enter the apartment, Toby heads straight for the bathroom. I worry that the big gathering might have been too much for him, too soon. The sound of the shower reassures me that he won’t hear how pathetic I’m about to be as I turn to our other love in desperation.

“I need some fucking assistance here, Kitten. What the fuck do we do to help him?”

Shiloh joins me on the sofa, mirroring my own helplessness in his suddenly glassy eyes. “I have no idea, Donnie. I have no fucking clue and it’s breaking my heart seeing him like this.”

Neither of us notice the shower cutting off, but we hear the creak of the bathroom door. When the sound of his shuffled steps lead into the bedroom, I stand up and help Shiloh back to his feet as well. We need to go holdour pup. As long as it takes, I won’t give up on him and I know Shiloh feels the same way.

69

TOBY

I’ve been numb for weeks. As bad as my womb shooter hurt me, it was my father that made me like this. Deep down, I never expected Moira Grady to change her tune. But I had already let my father back into my heart, and he trampled it. It doesn’t matter that it was unintentional. It doesn’t matter that he apologized after the fact.

He broke my trust.He broke my fucking heart.

Parents are supposed to love and protect their children. If someone who is supposed to be biologically conditioned to love me can’t manage to do it, how the fuck am I supposed to believe that I can trust my heart to these men?

Shy would never hurt you like that. Owner stood up for Eric when he didn’t even know him and had everything to lose. Neither of them would put you through what they did.

Shut up, stupid inner voice!

Logically, I know I can trust them. I know I can trust the guys at the manor. But my heart doesn’t trust mybrain right now. My heart is still stuck being the little boy who wants his mommy and daddy to love him. That little boy has been disappointed since his Me-maw died and left him alone in that family.

I can’t keep doing this.

The people who gave me life don’t have any more say in what I do with it. The only people who matter are the ones who have stuck beside me for the last three years — or three months in Owner’s case.

The fact remains that he’s been here and has fought for me even when he had zero clue who I was.

The knob for the shower doesn’t squeak for once when I turn it off, and I have to smile at that. Sid told me a trick for fiddling with the way I turn it to stop the squeal. I didn’t think it would work. Apparently, he had a lot of reasons to get very handy over the years as the oldest of five with two working parents.

Wiping the steam off the mirror, I am shocked by my appearance. I’ve been avoiding looking at myself since my graduation. I’ve been avoiding a lot.

Running my hand over the scruff on my cheek, I realize I look like absolute shit. A beard is most definitely not in my future, but the smile feels like it’s the start of something new. I’m determined to make it work with the men I love.

Tonight is our fresh start.

It doesn’t take them long to join me in the bedroom after I finished having my epiphany. I can’t stop the smirk from showing on my face at the looks on their face.The fact that I’m laying naked in the middle of our bed is apparently a bit of a surprise for them.

I’m done hiding behind the fear. I’m going to be brave and fight for what I want, for those I love.

“It’s good to see you smile, Pup,” Owner rumbles as he pulls off his shirt and climbs onto bed next to me. “How do we make it stick around?”

I feel Shiloh press against my back while I stare into our owner’s eyes. The pain in them is something I need to remedy. I put that there.

SHE put that there.

Okay, inner voice is kinda smart tonight…

“Just love me,” I tell him and lean forward to press my lips to his. Shiloh’s arms wrap around me from behind and I hand the bottle of lube to my owner. “Show me how much you love me tonight. I need my Owner. Own me. Both of you.”

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