Page 21 of Drag Me Up

I don’t even try to soften the question. After I was forced away from the Mendleton house, I did a lot of research into what is and isn’t helpful for someone who is bipolar. A lot of studies seem to be biased to sell a particular drug, but some of the blogs I read over the years from people dealing with the disorder have said that it’s important for the person to have a balance of independence and a support system. One without the other can result in more severe episodes of mania or can develop into an anxiety disorder.

I’m pretty sure what his friends did is smother him until the stress of putting on a show broke him, forcing manic episodes bordering on psychotic breaks. I watched it happen with Eric when he was a kid and no one knew what his condition was. I always knew it was more than merely acting out for attention.

“Stress triggers mania. Feeling like you’re under constant observation is a hell of a lot of stress, especially for five fucking years.”

Clarence looks at me with haunted eyes. “Better stressed and alive than the alternative,” he tells me as he heads to the door. “I’ll pick up the mug when I come over later if you still want me to come meet your mom.”

When the door closes behind him, I drop my headinto my hands and weep for the young man who has been through hell because of his own brain chemistry and well meaning but misguided friends. Pulling the panties and note out of my pockets, I pray for the first time in years that someone will look over this precious young man and bring him some relief.

17

ERIC

I barely remember to put the Mini in Park before I race into the house. I know I’m in a rush to wake up the drunk pup to question his ass, but wrecking my car into the side of the garage would not be a good way to do it – mainly because I don’t want to deal with the increase to my insurance premium. The front door slams against the shoe rack in the entry hall, making me wince as I kick my ankle boots in that general direction. I really hope I don’t wake everyone up, but my brain is in hyperfocus mode. I need to know what the fuck is going on, who our new neighbor really is. The grumbling and noise coming from up the stairs tells me I was unsuccessful in keeping this between me and the pup, so I head up.

“You are a BAD puppy, Tobias Grady!” I call out as I reach the landing for where most of our bedrooms are. If I’m going to wake everyone up, I might as well do it right.

The door at the end of the hall cracks open to showLucky in his footie pajamas rubbing his eyes and sucking on his rainbow binkie. His crochet Asexual flag Mothman is clutched under his arm and he’s looking at me like he wants to cry. I send him a smile and do a little fairy wave to make him giggle. I’m not mad at him. I know if he had put it together, he would have told me.

Spencer stomps down the steps from the third floor to come up behind his little boy, looking relieved. But I’m pissed at him as well. Based on his texts, he put it together just like Toby did. Only the difference is Toby doesn’t know who “Lewis Barnes”, professor of economics, could be to me. Spencer does.

Scott, Jace, and Shiloh come out into the hall while two sets of footsteps come up the stairs behind me. I turn to see Eli and Jay approach with different looks on their faces. Jay looks relieved to see me, but Eli looks guilty as fuck.

Does he know, too?

The only person who isn’t here is the one who set me off.

“TOBIAS ANDREW FUCKING GRADY!” I yell and stomp my foot. I feel bad when I see Shiloh wince and run to hide behind Jay and Eli, but my anger rolls right over the shame. I’ll feel it later, I’m sure.

The door to Toby and Shiloh’s room creaks open further to give the pup room to crawl out with his head hung low. It’s obvious he’s in the horrible state between drunk and hungover where your head is spinning, but your brain is coming back online.

Good.

I don’t soften a damn thing, not my voice, not my glare, not my stance when he gives me his puppy dog eyes and whines.

“I don’t give a flying fuck how much you had to drink last night. Why am I only finding out now that our new neighbor is your economics professor from last semester?”

Glancing around at the people who I trust most in the world, the feeling of betrayal inside of me is growing as I see the looks of guilt on Eli and Spencer’s faces.

“And whose bright idea was it to make sure I know nothing about our new neighbor to the point that I wouldn’t know I was picking him up at the club last night? Eli, Spencer? Any ideas on that one?”

The only sound that can be heard is the rhythmic sucking from Lucky with his binkie as I wait for someone to confess. Is it wrong that I still have hope that they didn’t make the connection? Oh, God, please let them say they didn’t realize…

Lucky gasps and his binkie falls from his mouth, making everyone turn to face him.

“Is Professor Barnes our new neighbor?!”

He’s so innocent at times it hurts. I reach out to pull him into a hug while the tension in the room breaks with a few chuckles.

“Yes, Lucky,” I tell him with a kiss to the top of his head. “Your Professor Barnes is the guy who moved into the back lot last week.”

Raising my head to glare at the two Doms who knew,I add, “And your Daddy and Uncle decided to not tell us who he is.”

Lucky gasps again and turns on Spencer and Eli. I wouldn’t have risked upsetting him if he was big, but little Lucky has no problem with feeling things. He’s come a long way, actually. Stomping over to the other men, he punches Eli in the stomach and kicks his Daddy in the shin.

Everyone is taken aback by that. One thing our resident little is not isviolent.

“You are both assholes of the highest order for this!” he yells at them, obviously no longer little. “If you ever fucking hide things from me again, I will… I will… I’ll poop on your heads!”

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