Page 36 of Soaring and Steadfast

“I don’t think any of us are perfect,” she admitted and paused. “I do think there are horrible people in the world – but I’m also positive you aren’t one of them. You’re so sweet, polite, and my best friend.”

“Then I’ve done a good job hiding my thoughts from you.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because what I want to do to you isn’t polite, it sure isn’t sweet, and it’s definitely not friendly in the slightest…”

There was a longing in his voice as he slowly turned to look at her again – and she swallowed seeing the desire in his eyes.

“Really?”

“Really,” he confirmed quietly, watching her as her mind raced with comprehension – and something started to unfold within her.

Hope.

“I want you for my own someday – and not as a friend,” he said quietly and gave her hand a slight squeeze.

Honestly, she was a little stunned that she didn’t pull back or pull away, knowing what he was saying or implying. Yeah, they had gone from friends to something more like a person jumping off a bridge into the wide open, waiting for what came next.

“I don’t know what to say,” she breathed.

“Don’t be scared of me,” he begged softly, his eyes searching hers. “Let me show you what a relationship should be like between people. Know that I’m going to make mistakes, but I would protect you with everything I am.”

“But how?” she whispered painfully, her mind racing at what all of this could mean. “I’m only in town for another few days, and then I’m back in Louisville. You’re here, stationed on a ship, and I’m sure you’ll be leaving soon. I mean, we are two different people, two different lives, and well, we are too different, Louis.”

“I know,” he said, looking away. “This would be a massive change for both of us, but I’m willing. I’d take care of everything if you gave me a chance.”

“Maybe I’m not understanding…” she asked, confused. “A chance to have a baby like you said inside?”

“A chance to build a life together,” he replied, not looking at her. “A chance to take care of you, to provide a home for you, to give you a child, a life here… with me.”

Okay, this was not how she expected today to go.

“You’ve never,” she faltered, unsure what to say. “You’ve never really shown any indication that… that you’re interested in me until today.”

“I didn’t think you were ready for something more,” he replied softly, swallowing. “And maybe you aren’t still. That’s okay. I just wanted to show you my proverbial hand of cards, so you knew what move to make next in this game of life, my friend.”

“You’ve never even kissed me…”

“And I won’t until you are ready,” he tossed a quick smile that looked more like a grimace of pain as he nodded. “Let’s get out of here and change this whole conversation to something lighter. I promised you swimming on the beach, and some fun while you were in town. I sure never intended to be a storm cloud in your life.”

“Louis?”

“Yeah?”

“Kiss me,” she whispered tearfully, realizing that this man was even now putting her feelings and emotions first. He had tossed out so much between them, but the moment she didn’t jump into the idea wholeheartedly, he backed off. He’d done that so many times, even when they were texting, because he was a good man –a sweet man– and would put her first in his mind. That was all she wanted: to be loved, revered, cherished, and cared for. She had wanted a marriage, a bond with someone, and yearned for a family – only to have it stripped from her by the one person who should have grieved with her, held her as she cried, and this man had done that.

He reached for her, supported her, long before he ever knew her – because that was who he was deep within his soul.

“No,” he said hoarsely, looking at her. “Our first kiss won’t be in a car, in a parking garage. I want it to be something beautifulyou will never forget. I’ll kiss you, but not right now. Right now, I need to get us moving.”

She nodded silently, marveling at him and replaying all his words in her mind, realizing once again he was giving her time to be sure of whatever this was. As she watched his profile, she saw his knuckles were white on the steering wheel, and his jaw flexed slightly, almost like he was holding himself in check, and she couldn’t help but wonder what was going through his mind as he drove.

Lila grabbed the first modest swimsuit she could find, her hands trembling slightly as she pulled it on. The anticipation buzzing beneath her skin was unbearable. Before she knew it, they were pulling into a parking lot near the beach on base. The scent of salt and sun-warmed sand drifted in through the car windows, wrapping around her like a long-lost memory. She breathed it in deeply, letting it soothe the tension coiled in her chest.

A wooden boardwalk stretched alongside a weathered building, leading over the dunes. Through the swaying sea grasses, she caught glimpses of the water beyond, its surface glistening beneath the fading sunlight. The sight tugged at something deep within her.

“Ready?” Louis asked, his voice gentle, carrying none of the urgency she felt thrumming in her veins. He was back to being the patient, polite, and never-pushy Louis—the one she had come to know through months of tender, carefully worded messages. The one she was beginning to realize had settled into the cracks of her heart without her permission.

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