Page 58 of Wedded to the Sinful Duke

“I always forget how light you are on your feet,” she teased.

He chuckled, his grip on her waist tightening slightly. “And you, my dear, are full of surprises. Who knew you could keep up with me so well?”

“Perhaps you’re just easy to follow,” she quipped, her smile widening.

Jonathan smirked, leaning in closer as they continued to dance. “Or maybe I’m just an excellent leader.”

Ciara laughed, the sound like music to his ears. “Modest as ever, I see.”

Their banter flowed effortlessly, a dance of words that matched the rhythm of their steps. As they moved together, Jonathan felt an overwhelming urge to pull her even closer, to let her know just how much she meant to him. The intensity of his feelings was almost too much to bear.

“Tell me, Ciara,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with emotion, do you always dance this well, or is it just because of me?”

She raised an eyebrow, her smile turning mischievous. “I suppose you’ll never know. But I will say, you make it quite enjoyable.” She glanced away from him then her smile was focused on him once more. “Just look how happy they are.”

“Who?” he asked, wondering who she was referring to.

“Penelope and James,” she gushed. “Isn’t it wonderful to know that you have chosen your person, and you get to spend the rest of your life with them? That is true happiness…”

As they continued to dance, Jonathan felt a surge of emotion welling up inside him. He reminded himself, with a sharp pang of regret, that he could not afford to fall in love with Ciara. He couldn’t allow himself to be vulnerable, to love, because he didn’t believe in love. Love only broke people, the way it broke his father when his mother died, leaving him a shell of the man he once was, empty and cruel. Jonathan didn’t want to become that. He would rather live life on his own terms, without love, even if that meant fighting it.

The music stopped, and with it, the magic of the moment. Jonathan abruptly shut himself away, his demeanor turning cold. He released Ciara’s hand and stepped back, the warmth that had enveloped them now replaced by a chill.

Ciara noticed the sudden change and concerned, followed him toward the other end of the ballroom.

“Jonathan, what’s the matter?” she asked her voice soft but filled with worry.

He turned to face her, his expression hardening. “Nothing is the matter,” he said defensively. “I should remind you that soon, the ton will have another marriage to obsess over, so our time together is running out. Perhaps now is a good time to find a lover to take in to entertain yourself after we go our separate ways.”

He regretted those words the moment he had said them, but it was too late to take them back. He knew the words were like a slap in the face as Ciara’s eyes widened with anguish. Somehow,she remained calm. He knew that she was good at masking her hurt.

“Is that what you think I should do?” she asked, her voice steady, although he could see the storm of emotion brewing just underneath the surface.

Jonathan’s gaze faltered for a moment before he forced himself to look away. “Yes,” he replied, his tone harsh. “It is as we agreed, after all.”

Without another word, she turned and walked away. He watched her go, a deep sense of regret gnawing at him. He knew he had hurt her, and the realization cut him deeply. But he convinced himself that it was for the best, that he was protecting them both from inevitable heartache.

As Ciara disappeared into the throng of guests, he felt the walls around his heart solidify once more. He couldn’t allow himself to be vulnerable, no matter how much he longed to be with her. He couldn’t risk turning out to be like his father, making all those around him utterly miserable.

Just one look at the marriage of his parents was enough proof that even what started with love would end in misery. It was simply better to walk away before he made both himself and Ciara miserable.

And so, with a heavy heart, he resigned himself to the painful distance he had created, knowing he might have just lost the one person who could truly understand him.

Ciara couldn’t believe that Jonathan would say something like that, especially after all the time they had spent together. She felt a mixture of rage and hurt brewing inside of her, and she didn’t know how to get it all out.

She noticed Adeline standing alone and seized the chance to approach her.

“Ah, there you are,” Adeline smiled, then immediately after, her smile was erased. “Is everything all right?”

“Yes, of course,” Ciara nodded. This was neither the time nor the place for intimate conversations because in a place such as this one, even walls had ears. “I’m just a bur overwhelmed by everything. Sometimes, I think I’ll never get used to these occasions.”

Adeline placed her hand gently on her friend’s shoulder. “You are doing just fine. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

That was exactly what Ciara was doing. But at the same time, she had to remind herself of the boundaries that she had set before, those same boundaries which she and Jonathan had crossed. Returning to the initial place now seemed impossible. She was desperate to discuss everything with Adeline, but she knew that conversation would have to wait.

“I’ll try not to be,” Ciara replied, grateful for her friend’s words. “What you have you been up to in my absence? Have you danced with someone?”

Ciara was also desperate to change the topic of the conversation, and fortunately, Adeline was more than happy to oblige.

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