Page 51 of One Pucking Chance

CHAPTER

TWENTY-ONE

ANNALISE

My brain hurts as dueling emotions square off within my skull. The high of wrapping a movie that might turn out to be the best I’ve done mixed with the low of leaving this place that has brought me so much joy and Jaden has my head pounding.

After a long shower, I can still feel Jaden everywhere. I can see him places too, like below my collarbone, where I’m sure he purposely left a hickey. I can’t even be mad. The truth is my heart twists when I see the memory of Jaden’s mouth on my skin.

Last night was stupid on my part. I should’ve known better. I fear I made a mess of a beautiful friendship. I know that Jaden wanted more, and maybe in a different world, it could work, but not in this one. We’re too different.

Miranda’s voice startles me. I didn’t hear her enter. “Everything from the trailer is packed and in the car. You almost set here?”

I turn from the pile of clothes on my bed that is far from packed.

She gasps. “Anna! Why are you crying?”

I am? I lift the palm of my hand to my face to find wetness. “I…I didn’t realize I was. That’s weird.” I plaster on a smile. “It’s nothing.”

She purses her lips, lifting her brows. “The hickey on your chest says otherwise.”

Bringing my hand to my chest, I quickly cover it.

“Too late. Already saw it. Spill it.”

I sigh. “I slept with Jaden last night.”

“Obviously.” She nods. “And?”

I lift my shoulders. “I don’t know. I’m going to miss him. I really loved it here.”

She gives me a warm smile. “I know. I did, too.” She joins me by the bed and starts folding my clothes. “Can I remind you that you’re both millionaires? You have the money to fly across the country and see each other whenever you want. He travels for work and quite often out west. You can meet him. When you’re not on location, you can be here. It could work if you want it to.”

“I don’t want a relationship,” I counter.

“Why?”

“You know why. It’s not time. I’m not going to be tied down. I want to focus on my career. Plus, Jaden and I are different. We don’t fit in each other’s worlds.”

“Well, that’s not true. Anna, I know you love your work, but what will it take to prove to yourself that you’re worthy? You think some gold statue of a naked guy given to you by stupid academy members means anything? They don’t get to dictate your worth. Their opinion means nothing.”

“I know.” I choke on a sob. “But I have to showthemthat I was right.”

Tears fall as I think back to theinterventionmy parents put me through. I was seventeen when they sat me down with a couple of their closest friends, other actors I’ve known my whole life. They all took turns telling me why I wasn’t cut out for this business, why I would be happier doing something…anything else. They assured me that I didn’t possess the talent or aptitude to learn the skills required to be a respected actor. They made me feel so small that the weight of that day still pushes me down today. Those people, who I thought loved me, shattered my heart. The worst part is a little piece of me believed them. I almost quit. I probably would’ve if it wasn’t for Miranda. She’s been my closest friend since I was twelve and, at points in my life, the only one who’s believed in me.

“Honey.” Miranda takes my hands in hers, tears now rolling down her cheeks. “They don’t matter. You know that you will never be enough for them. The only person you have to be enough for is yourself.”

“I want them to see me.” My voice cracks with emotion. “Just once, I want them to be proud, realize they were wrong, and tell me I’m talented. That’s not too much to ask of one’s parents.”

She squeezes my hands. “Normal parents, no. But Anna, you were raised by narcissists. They will never give you the validation you want. I’m so sorry because you’re the sweetest person in the world and deserve better, but that’s the reality. They will never love you like they should because they’re too stuck on themselves. But you can’t let their issues ruin your life. You have to let their expectations go...” She pulls me into a hug. “You have to love yourself.”

I hold my dearest friend as my tears continue to fall. “I’m just tired. I didn’t sleep last night.”

Miranda chuckles. “That good, huh?”

Stepping back from our embrace, I swipe my fingers under my eyes to wipe my tears. “Better.”

Her head falls back. “We have a lot to talk about. But first, you need to get packed. We were supposed to be on the plane an hour ago.”

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