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She was a girl I slept with for a week. End of discussion.

I was feeling pretty great after hanging out with my mom and sister all day, but the closer I get to Deacon’s house, the more uneasy I become.

Yeah, so our week ended on a sour note. We’re both adults. Neither of us is going to make a scene. I’ll just smile, make a little small talk, and move on.

I seriously don’t know why I’m getting myself so worked up over this.

Pulling up to the curb in front of the house, I shut off my car’s engine. Deacon’s car is gone, so he must still be getting Pauly. The second I step out of the car, I hear Tiny’s laughter coming from around back.

I retrieve the case of beer from the back seat and close my door.

“Hey, Lieutenant.” Snow walks up beside me, carrying a pie in each hand.

“What do you have there?”

“My mom made her famous apple pie. Make sure you get a piece before they’re gone. They’re kind of a mix between a pie and a crumble. So they have that sugary coating, but the breaded pie crust on the bottom. They’re amazing, trust me.”

“Awesome.” I chuckle at his enthusiasm. “I’ll make sure to grab a slice.”

I open the back gate and motion for him to go ahead and then close it behind me.

My chest tightens at the sight of her. She’s standing in a group beside Tiny and Stokes. She’s so beautiful, it hurts. She’s cut her long blond hair to her shoulders, and the style fits her well. She’s wearing perfectly tight skinny jeans and a form-fitting maroon long-sleeved thermal. The outfit alone is simple autumn attire, but on her, it’s stunning.

All at once, every question I’ve asked over the past few months has found its answer in one fell swoop.

Her.

Fuuuckk.

I’m frozen to the spot, my legs refusing to propel me forward. It’s the strangest feeling to be utterly enamored with the mere sight of a person. I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed her until just now. An invisible force pulls on my heart, begging me to close the distance between us, but at the same time, I’m overcome with dueling emotions that I can’t figure out—paralyzing me.

“Boss.” Abrams steps in through the gate. “Do you want me to take those over to the cooler?” He eyes the box of beer in my grasp.

“Yeah, thanks.” I swallow hard, pulling in a breath, and hand him the box.

When I look back toward her, her gaze pierces my own, and it takes my breath a little. She stands there, mouth slightly agape, eyes sorrowful. I want to run to her and pull her into me, kissing her until we’re the only two in existence. But that’s not how this story goes. Regardless of how much I feel like I want her, I can’t. We’re not compatible in that way. I won’t toss aside my convictions. I’d never lose myself to love another. The price is too great.

Abrams returns, stepping in front of me. He breaks the connection between Lexi and me, and I can breathe. He holds up a can. “Beer?”

“Yeah, thanks, man.” I take the can from him, open it with a pop, and chug half of it down.

“Okay, then…” He gives me an amused smirk and saunters off.

This time, I keep my gaze averted and continue into the backyard, away from where Lexi stands with the others. The new game plan is to say hi to everyone, check in on Pauly when he gets here, and feign some excuse to leave.I have to visit my mom.Who could argue with that?

“Hey,” her soft voice greets me.

I close my eyes, release a breath, and turn toward her.

“Hey.”

“I figured I’d come over and say hi. I didn’t want things to be awkward for you. I mean, these are your friends, and you shouldn’t have to avoid everyone because I’m here. You know?” The sincerity in her bright blues is piercing.

I swallow hard. “I wasn’t avoiding anyone,” I say, not convincing anyone. “You have every right to be here. It’s Montgomery’s place, and he and Cam are a thing. So…”

The corner of her mouth tilts up. “Well, I’m just saying, you don’t need to avoid me. We’re cool. Or at least I am. I won’t embarrass you or anything like that.”

“You’re different,” I say without thinking.

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