Page 53 of Eternally London

“I have? Good different?”

“Yeah, definitely.” He nods. “You were right all along. This trip was great for you. I hated every second of it, of course”—he chuckles—“but you needed it.”

“I think I needed a purpose, something bigger than my personal struggles, to focus on. At the end of the day, if I’m never able to have biological children, I still live a blessed life. You know?”

“I do know.” He pulls me back down into his arms.

His thumb trails lightly up and down my arm as we become lost in thought. The sun leaves the sky outside the hotel window, and the city glows from the streetlights.

At some point, I fall asleep with a light heart. I have Loïc, and tomorrow, he’ll get to meet our baby girl.

Life truly works in mysterious, marvelous ways.

Loïc

“My love for London is infinite, yet it manages to grow deeper every day.”

—Loïc Berkeley

I grin as London presses her face into my chest to block out the smell of the bus. She tells me that the ride down to Lindi the first time with Abdu was so much more pleasant, pee break and all. Being surrounded by some BO is nothing. I’ve spent weeks out in the field with a group of dudes. I’m accustomed to the smell.

I have to wonder how London plans to live here for the next six months. The way of life here is way out of her comfort zone, yet she insists on staying here until the adoption is final.

My little girl is growing up.

I’m nervous as hell to meet this baby. I’m all for adoption, and if this makes London happy, I’m an even bigger fan of the idea. But, at the same time, she is just so over the moon in love with this baby.What if I don’t feel it—the connection?I suppose I have no idea what I’ll feel—or what’s even normal to feel for that matter. I’m sure not all adoptive parents experience love at first sight like London did. I have to keep reminding myself that, regardless of the emotions I experience today, I will grow to love the baby.

After a very long day, the bus finally makes it to Lindi. We check in to the hotel before heading to the hospital, so we have a place to leave our bags.

London is almost bouncing as we walk the few blocks to the hospital. “I just can’t wait.”

“Ah, Miss London,” a man in a white lab coat greets us when we enter.

“Dr. Gyasi,” London shakes his hand. “I’d like you to meet my husband, Loïc.”

We exchange a few pleasantries before Dr. Gyasi tells us how happy he is that baby girl will be going to a safe home.

“Can we see her?” London asks anxiously.

“Oh, yes, please do.” He motions toward the side of the room.

London takes my hand, and we head in the direction the doctor pointed.

“Hi, sweetie,” London says to the baby girl. Her voice quivers with raw emotion as tears stream down her face.

When the little girl sees London, her face lights up in the most adorable smile I’ve seen. She shakes some metal bracelets in her pudgy hand.

“You still have the bracelets? That’s great.” London sits on the bed, facing the baby. “I missed you so much. I thought about you every single day.” She reaches out and runs her thumb against the baby’s cheek. “Can I hold you?” London extends her arm out.

The baby looks to London’s face and then to her outspread arms a few times—back and forth—as she decides upon her response. After a beat, she crawls forward, rests on her knees, and holds out her arms toward London. London slowly takes her into her arms, setting the baby on her lap.

“Hi.” London grins toward the baby as the little girl touches London’s cheek in awe. “I love you.”

I’m completely memorized as I watch the two of them, each equally fascinated by the other.

“I couldn’t leave you because I love you too much,” London tells her.

The baby continues to explore London’s face with her hands. She reaches out to feel London’s hair.

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