Page 68 of Keeping London (Flawed Heart)

I laugh. “Dude, not everyone is an oversharer like you are.”

“It wouldn’t hurt to give me something. I mean, I talk your ear off all day, and you can’t even throw me a bone?” Cooper jokes.

“Exactly! With all of your sharing, is there really time for me to talk?”

“You know I was kidding. I don’t really talk that much.”

“You talk more than I do,” I offer.

“Who doesn’t?” Cooper chuckles.

“True.” I grin.

“Actually, I take that back,” Cooper states. “This deployment, you’ve shared more than you ever have. It’s kind of disturbing really. I don’t know if it’s London or this country that has you all worked up, but some conversations, I can’t even believe it’s you.”

“I hear ya. I’m disturbing myself. It’s like the floodgates have been broken, and now, I’m this oversharing fool…like you.”

“You see, I know you meant that as a jab, but I took it as nothing but a compliment.” Cooper shoots me a grin.

“I can’t even remember what we were talking about.”

“Skype sex.”

I ignore his comment. “No, my weird feeling.”

“There you go, talking about your feelings again.”

“I’m gonna kick your ass,”

“I love ya, too, bro,” Cooper responds before punching me in the arm.

After the gym and another shower, I open my laptop to type out a quick email to London before heading to bed. I find one from her in my inbox. Besides Skyping with her, there is no better feeling than the one I get from seeing her name pop up when I open my email.

To: Loïc Berkeley

From: London Wright

Subject: Question 49

Loïc,

My favorite exercise? You know I hate exercising! I’m not surprised that yours is running. I would have guessed that. I’m going to have to say Zumba. I’ve never done it, but I think I’d like it. It’s like dancing. Who doesn’t like dancing?

Wait a minute! Sex is totally exercise, right? Forget Zumba. Sex with you is the only exercise I need, and it’s totally a workout.

Tomorrow’s my birthday, as you know. ;-) I think we’re just going to go out to a piano bar with a group of girls.

I was thinking of doing a spa weekend with my mom, Georgia, and Paige, but my mom is in Europe with my dad on business, and Georgia has to study for some exam.

Then, I thought for a moment about doing something fun, like an all-inclusive resort in Mexico or some other cool destination, but I feel like we just got back from LA, and honestly, it wasn’t the most fun. So, Michigan, it is. Yay.

Going to new places without you is kind of depressing. The entire time I’m there, I’m thinking, “Oh, Loïc would love this.” Or, “I wonder if Loïc has been here before.” It’s weird, annoying, and slightly pathetic. But I just can’t help it.

I’m hoping that, as time goes by, this year will get easier, you know? It has to.

Part of me thinks I’m an idiot for being so infatuated with someone I’ve only known for nine months. But I don’t even care. I can’t help the way I feel. I believe my feelings. I know they’re real. I know I love you. And there’s no guidebook on how to love or miss someone. Some of my feelings might lean toward obsession. But who am I to judge myself? Lol. It is what it is.

I love you. I miss you. I’m lost (metaphorically) without you. I don’t handle being without you well. I suppose you can add it to my flaw list, but if I’m going to have a flaw, it’s a good one to have. Without it, it would mean that there’s no you…and that would never be acceptable.

---