Page 54 of Bumping into You

That realization stings. I step back from her to give myself some space. “I’m fine,” I say and turn and look out to the balcony away from her. I need to just keep it in. No need to burden her with my struggles.

“Niall.” She places a hand on my cheek and turns me to face her. The sincerity and care in her eyes have me melting. No one has looked at me with such genuine concern since my mam’s passing, and it breaks something within me.

I sigh before letting the words pour forth, like a dam breaking from the weight of all my emotions. “It is hard. My mam was my best friend. We were all each other had in the world, but then she was taken away from me too soon. I’ve been struggling with that and trying to make myself be happy again. I almost didn’t comeon this cruise, but I knew I didn’t want to let Greg down, and I knew my mam wouldn’t want me to miss this either. I needed a chance to get away from Boston, from the constant reminder that she is gone.”

Gwen nods, encouraging me to continue.

“I know everyone feels sad about it, and they’ve tried to reach out, but I haven’t wanted to let them help. I haven’t wanted to burden them with my emotions. I was so strong for my mam while she was sick, but there are times when I feel so lost without her. She was my one constant for my whole life, and without her I feel . . . alone. It’s just me now.”

“Oh, Niall,” Gwen says.

I brush a tear from her face as I say, “See this is what I mean. I’m causing you sadness.”

“Yes, but it’s only because I hate that you feel so alone. You’re not alone, you know? You’ve got Greg and Trent. My mom and dad talk as if you’re their son too. And not that it’s much, but you’ve got me. Just as you said to me, I’m here for you. Anytime you feel like you want or need to talk, I’ll be an ear for you.”

I pull her in for a hug, my chest pounding rapidly at her kind words. It’s time I let my friends in, because she’s right—I’m not alone. I have a great group of friends who feel likemo thaeghlach, just like I’ve got a great crew at work who are also like family. I’ve been looking at this all wrong for too long, and it’s time to change that, to lean on the people that care about me.

“Thank you,” I tell her. We stand embracing each other, looking out over the ocean for several moments.

My phone vibrates, and I pull it out of my pocket.

Greg

Where are you? We’re about to head out.

“We better go,” I say. “The others are going to wonder where we are.”

Niall

Heading your way now.

We hurry out of the room and off the boat, meeting up with the rest of the party just after the pier.

“Finally!” says Margot. “We were worried you weren’t going to make it. Wait, were you two together?”

“Yep.” Gwen shrugs. “Just grabbing some food.”

After a round of hugs, the grandparents leave with Maggie to go to the beach. The rest of our group heads to the off-roading four-by-four adventure through Aruba Arikok National Park.

A very bumpy, very dusty ride takes us through the national park. We see burrowing owls and other local wildlife as well as all sorts of flowers and plants. The view is amazing. But by the time we get there, we’re all ready for the refreshing waters of Conchi, a natural pool.

The tour guide gives us a brief history of the area. The Conchi, which means bowl, has unique natural pools created by the ocean’s relentless crashing waves.He explains that the Conchi has two natural pools: a larger bottom one and a much smaller upper pool. The upper pool is only deep enough for a small handful of people to swim in it at once.

We gather our belongings from the four-by-four and find an area on the small beach to lay our towels and packs. The view is breathtaking with dramatic shows of water spraying over the rocks as the ocean ebbs and flows against them. Within the pool, the water is calm and crystal clear.

Some of the group from the excursion has already rid themselves of their shoes and extra clothes and are swimming in the water. The more adventurous are heading over to the rocks and cliff jumping into the pool.

Gwen and Holly quickly wade into the water and wait for the others to join them.

“The water feels amazing,” shouts Holly.

“Definitely refreshing after that ride,” agrees Gwen.

“Come on, slow pokes,” they yell out to us, heading over with their snorkeling gear toward the rocks closer to the ocean.

After snorkeling for only a few minutes, Trent says, “I’m going to try cliff diving.”

“Cúla búla,” I say. “I’ll join you. Greg, you game?”

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