Page 103 of Slash & Burn

Maybe.

CHAPTER 41

JILL

“Oh those look so nice!” my mother exclaimed, drawing the attention of everyone in the store. Cash returned her hug, but then quickly turned back to the shelves he was building me. They did look very nice, so my mom wasn’t wrong.

I’d seen more of Cash in the last few weeks than I had the last few years. But we’d slipped pretty easily into a groove. His carpentry skills were no joke, and he’d made me the most beautiful custom shelves I’d ever seen. I couldn’t wait to pile them full of books and watch people lose their minds.

“Mom, what are you doing here?” I waved her over, getting her to follow me back into the office so the rest of the team could keep working. I had a couple of part-timers working on installing lights, and one young girl named Ashlee getting my computer systems and social media up and running. She was going to stay on once the store opened to work the floor and keep our Instagram feed lively. I wanted nothing to do with it.

“I was just stopping by to bring you something.” She had that overly cute look about her, like she was about to kick over a hornet’s nest and knew it.

“Bring me what?”

I hadn’t noticed the large tote hanging off her arm until right then, and she dropped one strap to pull out a large picture frame. “I think this needs a place of prominence here,” she said, her cheeks rounding on a bright, wide smile.

As I took the frame from her, my heart wrenched. It was the article about Grady and I, a huge photo of us pasted across the front of the paper. I’d hated that photo when it was taken, but now it just served to remind me of what I could never have. So, I hated it more.

“Mom, I don’t want this.” I tried to give it back to her, but she shook her hands, scowling.

“Jillian, don’t be like that. You should be proud of what you did with that program.”

It wasn’t the program I didn’t need reminding of. Although, that wasn’t exactly a bright spot either, considering I got fired anyway.

“I know, Mom. I’m proud, okay? I just don’t need to look at that all the time.”

“Why not?” Her confusion was so genuine it made it hard to be angry with her. I set the thing down on my desk.

“Staring at Grady doesn’t feel good. I don’t need to be reminded every day.”

She sat down in the chair next to my desk, like she wasn’t going anywhere for a while, so I reluctantly sat down too.

“Reminded of what? Of how good you two were together? Or that he’s three hours away?”

Ah. She wasn’t as clueless as she wanted me to believe. I blew out a breath, trying to figure out the best way to describe heartache to someone who’d married her high school sweetheart. She had no idea what this felt like.

“He has his life and I have mine. I don’t enjoy being reminded of that. Of how good we were, and that in the end that didn’t matter.”

“Pish,” she said, scrunching her face so hard her eyes disappeared for a second. “That’s a load of horseshit and you know it.”

My eyebrows shot up. Since when did my mother use language like that? “I don’t know it.”

My mother pointed at the photo of us in the frame. “You think something like that just lands in your lap, ready to go, no compromises, no challenges?”

“Like you and Dad faced challenges, Mom? You basically met on the playground and have been best friends ever since.”

She smiled at that. “Well, sure, that’s what it looks like. But you’re forgetting that in order for us to work, we had to make some serious decisions about our future a hell of a lot younger than you are now. We didn’t go to the same college by accident. We didn’t buy that old farm on a whim. The things we did for our family didn’t just happen, Jill. Give me a break.”

It appeared I was the one stepping on a hornet’s nest. “Sorry, I just mean, this isn’t the same thing.”

“No, you’re right.” She folded her hands in her lap, her lips pursed together for all of three seconds before she went on. “But the thing I’m trying to say, darling, is that the reason you and Grady aren’t together isn’t because he lives in Boston or works for the NHL or travels too much. And it’s not because you live here and have this amazing new store, either.”

“Oh?” I rolled my eyes, but waved my hand for her to go on.

“It’s because you’ve never believed you could have him.”

My back straightened.Had she known about my crush?

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