Page 104 of Faking It

To say I miss Gideon would be an understatement.

Longing threatens to stifle me. Guilt isn’t treating me any better. Both sensations give me sleepless nights, so much so that I’m here for my audition looking like something the cat dragged in. Well, at least, that’s how I feel. A glance in the mirror tells me I’m not half bad. I washed and curled my hair, then Tori did my makeup. Besides the faint dark circles that she tried her damnedest to hide with concealer, it’s a pass. At least, on the outside.

Inside, I’m dying.

I force a smile as the casting director beckons to me, and I enter the room for my audition. It’s a long script, and I’m forced to improvise the parts I forget, but I give myself a pat on the back when I’m done. I see nods on the panel, which is a good sign. They promise to call me if I’m shortlisted, and I head out.

Four movie auditions in two weeks, two already booked. That’s not bad. I should be celebrating my life finally looking up. Instead, I’m dancing with depression because deep down, I’m not one hundred percent okay. I fear I will never be, not as long as there’s a rift between Gideon and me. There’s a tug-of-war on my emotions, where I’m angry at him one moment, then feeling like shit for not trusting him. I’m desperate to believe he didn’t let the secret slip, but what other options could there be? If this were my mother’s doing, why hadn’t she appeared by now?

Throwing back my head on the seat, I groan with frustration. If only I knew how to fix this. I can’t apologize while still being on the fence. It wouldn’t be right. Gideon deserves someone who trusts him, and I deserve someone I can trust. Until I find proof otherwise, I can’t rule him out. Giving people the benefit of the doubt never worked well for me.

My phone starts going crazy as I head home, vibrating like hell on the seat next to me. Although I’m curious, I ignore it for now. The last thing I need is a run-in with cops. In a few months,Espionagewill be the talk of Tinseltown, and I’ll be riding its tailcoats. I can’t afford to smudge my reputation, not even a little, which is why I’m struggling to get over what Gideon did to me. What if Tori hadn’t caught that story? Where would I be now?

The phone keeps buzzing, so I turn it down, still thinking about him. I don’t think he meant any malice. Maybe he made it slip. I don’t know. I’m confused. Goddamnit, I just want answers!

I steer the car onto the curb, turn the engine off, then drop my head on the steering wheel. This is what I get for trusting someone, heartbreak. The sensitive organ feels like it’s being ripped to shreds.

Tori’s neighbor steps out of her apartment with her rat terrier tucked under her arm. She’s one of the friendliest people on the block, and although I’m not good at making conversations, we’ve had a few decent talks since I’ve been staying here. I wave to her as she closes her front door, and it surprises me when she doesn’t wave back. In fact, there’s a weird expression on her face, like she’s staring at something scary.

Glancing behind me, I see nothing there. Puzzled, I watch her departing form as she hurries away from me. With a shrug, I get inside Tori’s apartment to find her sitting on the couch, her arms tucked around her legs as she sobs.

Alarmed, I throw my bag down and fall on my knees in front of her. “Tori, talk to me, what’s wrong?”

She doesn’t reply, just shakes her head and keeps crying. A sudden thought came to me, and I look over her body for any bruises. “Did Stefan hurt you or something?”

No answer. Only sobbing.

“Sweetie, please. You’re scaring me. What’s wrong?”

“I tried calling you,” she finally mutters between her crying.

“Yeah, I turned the phone down. Sorry,” I reply, lifting my phone from where I’d dropped it in the bag.

“No… I’m the one who’s sorry. I’m sorry… so sorry!”

I pause amid opening the phone and peer up at her. “Sorry for what?”

“They know, Ana. Everyone knows.”

She bursts into another round of sobs, and just like that, the shoe drops. There’s no need to ask her to clarify. I don’t need to check my phone. Without even looking, I know what the barrage of messages is about. My secret’s out of the bag. My life’s over.

Thank you, Gideon. Thank you very much.

“There’s a short docu-film that will be airing tonight. Apparently, it’s been on the down-low until a few hours ago,” Tori mutters as I throw the phone aside. My entire body feels like I’m being electrocuted. Or, what I imagine electrocution feels like. “It’s a project Logan has been working on for a few weeks now.”

“Logan?” I blink furiously. “That makes no sense. Gideon would never be in cahoots with my ex.”

“It’s not Gideon,” she replies as I drop my face in my hands. “Your mom has the starring role.”

My head yanks up, sending a flash of pain along the base of my neck. “Who?”

“Your mom. She’s giving a tell-all. At least, that’s what the introduction says. She’s giving the narrative that you were an out-of-control teenager who tried to kill her man when he didn’t want to sleep—”

“Enough. I don’t want to hear anymore.” I rise from the floor, sick to my stomach. In fact, I think I’m really going to be sick. I dash into her powder room just in time to empty the contents of my lunch into the sink.

A gentle tug on my hair pulls it back. Tori’s perfume washes over me. “This is my fault,” she mumbles as I turn the tap on, washing the residue of my sickness down the drain.

“How is it your fault? You didn’t summon that evil witch into town,” I mumble back, then groan, tears stinging my eyes as reality sinks in. The movie I’d just filmed. The roles I just secured. What will become of them now that my past is out there? How do I prove I’m not the cold-hearted villain my mother is painting me out to be?

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