Page 66 of Love, Lies, and Celtic Knots

“Jos, if you’re willing, I’d like to try reconnecting with you through rope. If there’s any chance for us, we need to learn to communicate again and reestablish mutual trust. Shibari could help us do that. What do you think?”

I hold my breath as I await her answer. A whisper escapes her lips as she calmly nods.Yes.

“Take some time to think this through, and we can have another conversation about boundaries, needs, and limits. I have a standard contract document that we can tweak.”

After Joselyn leaves, I settle back into work with a lighter heart. I have a feeling everything’s going to be all right.

Chapter 9

Joselyn

When Brennen proposed we experience shibari together, I couldn’t believe it. If anything can reconnect us, I’m confident that the art form I’ve come to love will. I have to admit since participating, I’ve envied the couples I see experiencing the intimacy and emotional connection provided through the ropes. Can Brennen and I achieve that? I want it more than anything.

I spent time last evening thinking about what I need and want to get out of the experience with him, and my hard and soft limits. I’m looking forward to being able to communicate with him, openly and honestly. In my mind, it’s the key to a future with the man I’ve never stopped loving.

The jingle of my phone alerts me to a text.

Brennen: Good morning. Want to meet up today?

Joselyn: Yes.

Brennen: Lunch at the Silver Willow?

Joselyn: Perfect.

I see his texting style hasn’t changed. Brief and to the point. After agreeing to meet at noon, anticipation flows through my veins. I’m hoping we’ll come to an agreement today, and if he suggests we start immediately, I want to be prepared. I lookfor the perfect outfit to wear, along with the undergarments I want Brennen to see when we have our first scene. I pack a bag with essentials, including what’s necessary to freshen up and change afterward. I apply some dry shampoo to my hair, which is currently styled straight, and secure it in a ponytail to keep it out of the way for now. It can easily be let down in case Brennen wants to play with hair ties, which is on my list as a favorite. I keep my makeup minimal, as I prefer a natural look anyway, and don’t want to stain or dirty the ropes.

When I arrive at the restaurant, the hostess escorts me to a secluded table in the back corner, where Brennen is already waiting. He stands to greet me and holds out a chair.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Would you like something to drink?”

“Just water for me. I want to hydrate as much as possible.”

“Same.”

I take a paper out of my purse and hand it to Brennen. “I made some notes for you. Ties that I like and don’t like. Hard and soft limits.”

He takes a moment to read through the document. “Any medical issues or physical limitations I should know about?”

“Nothing comes to mind.”

“Okay. When we’re in a scene, I’ll always check in with you frequently. But if for some reason I don’t, please speak up. Since we haven’t been together for a long time, I may miss something. Do you use the standard safe words?”

“Yes.”

“What expectations do you have for today?”

I pause, considering my words carefully. “First and foremost, I want to know you again. I want to create the foundation for open communication and trust. I want to give you the power to meet my needs and give you what you need to trust me again.”

“That’s exactly what I want, too. By giving you what you want and need, I get what I want and need in return.”

He takes my hand and caresses it. I’m already feeling more connected, even though he hasn’t taken out a single rope.

We chat about mundane things as we finish a light lunch and head out.

“I’ll drive us and we can pick up your car later.” He leads me over to a vintage Mustang convertible.

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