Page 86 of His Sunshine Baby

“Why didn’t you just tell him?” asks Danny while starting the car.

But I shake my head. I already made my decision this morning. This past week with Nate was heaven. I lived without worries, with the best lover one could hope to wake up next to, every morning. I could have gotten seriously used to that, and easily too. But the longer I stayed, the more I felt like I was running away.

From my pack, and my problems. I avoided Xavier, Reagan, even Clark and Isabella. I avoided the days passing and Diego’s return coming closer. Being with Nate was like a dream I didn’t want to wake up from. Diego’s message was a brutal fucking reminder. I have no idea how he knew where to send it to, or what his aim was, but it was a shock to me. No matter what, Diego was coming after me.

And I didn’t want to involve Nate in that.

“I still think this isn’t good, babe. To leave like that.”

“Nathaniel would never have stopped at that. He already asked me twice if I wanted him to ban or kill Diego, Danny. I know he would break the rules of both his pack and mine and I can’t let him do that for me. He’s the King’s brother, his position is too important to do that.”

“But still, starting a fight?”

“That was all I could think of for him to let me go. Thank Moon Goddess I found this stupid folder this morning, it helped me come up with an excuse.”

To be honest, I didn’t find it by accident. I was looking for something that would make our fight a bit more genuine, but I didn’t expect Nathaniel to keep a whole file on me and Diego. I still can’t believe he knew I went to jail and didn’t say anything about it. How long had he known for? He obviously read it, so does that mean he doesn’t care about living with a criminal? About the ghosts of my past?

The more time I spent with Nate, the more it became obvious to me that we were moving on to a new relationship, something that couldn't be seen as simply friends with benefits. We kissed a lot for no reason, cuddled whenever we felt like it, and did pretty much everything together every night this week. Even the sex was much sweeter and more romantic, despite our carnal desire for each other.

If it wasn’t for Diego, maybe I would have given us a chance, listened to our whims, and stayed longer at Nate’s place. Maybe a few more days, and we would have become lovers without saying it.

“He said he doesn’t love me.”

“Well, that guy is either completely blind or very stubborn,” replies Danny while turning left.

I chuckle. I know Nate was lying. He said what he thought would hold me back. Because that was the rule we had agreed on from the start.

But Moon Goddess, it’s too late, way too late. I fell for that man, hard. For his kindness, his disarming honesty and smiles, and his gentle, electric blue eyes. The way he doesn’t hesitate to caress or hug me, or how he kisses me softly. Damn, I already miss him.

I think about our argument again. What will he think? I purposely didn't give him the chance to speak as it was hard enough for me already. But even so, Nate still tried to make me stay, and that broke my heart. Because the truth is, I didn’t want to leave him or make him think I wanted to. If things had been different, I would have trusted him a lot more than that, enough to confide in him about my past and let him back me up against my ex. I couldn’t. Our relationship was too fresh for that, and I was scared that Diego would shatter it all before I had a chance to do anything. I was too afraid. I could stand to lose Nate because of our feelings, but if something happened to him because of my ex...

Daniel finally parks the car at our home an hour later. We stopped by the hospital to give flowers to my dad, but it’s pretty late now, and I’m exhausted.

“What about Bobo?” I ask as Daniel opens the door.

“Too busy. I think his brother is giving him more work to keep him away from our territory.”

For some reason, our apartment feels pretty lonely now. Damn, I didn’t realize I would miss Nate so much. I change into my nightgown and curl up in my bed. I haven’t slept here in a while. Has my room always been this cold and silent? I close my eyes, hoping everything will be fine. Between Nate and me, and tomorrow, too.

Tomorrow, the cursed day Diego is allowed back on our turf. I spend all night thinking about how to behave, what to say, and how I can ignore that bastard. The next morning, when I get up very early, I have a simple strategy in mind. It’s Sunday, and for once, I’m up before Danny. Hence, he is shocked to find me making coffee when he comes out of his room about half an hour later.

“Damn, someone fell out of her bed.”he whistles.

“More like I didn’t sleep a wink,” I sigh, going to the couch with my cup.

“Mmhmm. Bad thoughts?”

I nod with a frown before taking a sip. Daniel sighs before taking a cup for himself.

“What’s the battle plan?”

“There isn’t one, Danny. I’ve decided, I don’t care about this jerk. I don’t want anything to do with him, I’m done. He can do whatever the hell he wants as long as he stays the hell away from me.”

Daniel stays silent for a few seconds and eventually comes to sit next to me on the couch.

“You know it’s not going to be that easy, right, babe?”

“I know, but I’m not going to give in. I’m over whatever happened, Daniel, and that’s what I will stick to until he understands. I don’t want him back in my life. He had better stay the hell away, because I’m not going back to jail.”

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