Page 8 of The Tides of March

“What?” Tony asked, leaning away from Nox.

She whimpered out another apology. “I didn’t know what to tell you, baby!” she said and Nox bit into his knuckle, squealing.

“Celia! This is—!” Nox waved a hand in front of his eyes as they watered. “I can’t wait to tell Merlin. He is going toflip!”

Tony grabbed Nox, giving him a shake. “Tell him what? Why is Merlin going to flip? Is he my dad? Because I will—” he couldn’t even finish the thought, Tony felt lightheaded and queasy.

“No!” Nox flailed his hands wildly. “That would bebonkers.You don’t have a dad, T. Your mom was a…Ahem.” He raised his brows suggestively but Tony didn’t get it.

“What do you mean, I don’t have a dad?” He turned to his mother, expecting her to laugh and say Nox was bonkers but she offered him a misty, apologetic look as she reached for his cheek.

“I’m so sorry, baby! I told you your father ran off because I didn’t know how to explain that…it just happened. I’ve never been with a man and you don’t have a human father.”

“Are you telling me I’m some kind of messiah?” Tony asked her and both Celia and Nox burst into laughter.

“No! Nothing like that,” she reassured him, but Tony’s face fell.

“Figures. I’m just an unwanted anomaly,” he said, then yelped when she pinched his arm.

“You watch your mouth!” Celia scolded. “You were never unwanted! I have loved you every moment of yourblessedlife, Anthony. Because that is exactly what you were:a blessing.”

“You’re right.” Tony shushed her and pressed an obedient kiss to his mother’s cheek. “You were the best, Ma, and I always knew I was your special boy. I just didn’t realizehowspecial,” he said with a sarcastic snort. “But how did it happen?”

She shook her head slowly as her gaze grew distant. “I still have no idea. It was my first year as a teacher and I had given my oath to serve Epona. I made a vow of chastity, like manySisters of Epona,” she explained, then raised a hand to whisper behind it. “Which didn’t seem like much of a sacrifice at the time because I’ve never been attracted to men.”

“That was never a secret. You dated Kitty for four years,” Tony said flatly but he had assumed that there had been at least one man in his mother’s romantic past.

“She was a Sister, too, but she moved to Savannah and started her own chapter. I should call her, it’s been ages since we talked.”

“What about your oath?” Tony asked, trying to keep her focused.

“Right!” Celia laughed and waved it off. “It’s just been so long since I’ve even thought about Kitty and you know she?—”

“Ma!” Tony pressed his hands together. “What about the oath? What does that have to do with me not having a father?”

“Alright!” She shushed Tony, patting his chest. “I was saying: it was just after I took my oath when I found out I was expecting. I thought it was the end of the world and that I was going to get kicked out of the sisterhood and that your grandparents would kill me. But everyone was delighted, except for your grandfather. Apparently, it’s just a thing that happens from time to time, with the more devoted followers.”

“Come on!” Tony snorted dubiously and looked at Nox. “She’s talking about parthenogenesis. It’s not possible with humans and only happens in mythology with titans or Athena…or Jesus—a messiah,” he argued but Nox’s lips pulled into a hard line.

“How many times has Christianity borrowed from earlier belief systems?” he asked, raising a finger. “I’ve always found it very interesting that Mary was riding an ass when she arrived in Bethlehem and that Jesus rode one when he went to the temple to deliver one of his sternest sermons. We know that what may seem like an obvious, or mundane element in a parable isoften a clue. And I believe that Mary was riding an assbecauseof her parthenogenetic pregnancy, like the Sisters of Epona. Christianity merely erased all the others because Mary was the only virgin who mattered to their narrative.”

“Oh…!” Tony’s mind was blown and he felt like a fool for not seeing it before. Asses, or donkeys, were as ubiquitous in the Middle East as cars and buses. Why would a donkey be featured so prominently, as if it was a key detail and truly mattered unlessit did.

Nox made a knowing sound. “Epona is associated with horses—anddonkeys, especially—because they symbolize patience, loyalty, wisdom… She was adopted by the Roman cavalry, to protect their horses and donkeys, and that was key tohersurvival as a Celtic goddess. But she represents not just fertility and horses, but the bond between humans and animals and the transmission of faith and knowledge.”

Celia pumped her fists and cheered. “That’s our girl! Instead of praying to Mary, like my good Catholic friends, I prayed to Epona. I devoted myself to her service and we worshipped a different trinity—the Dagda and his three,” she explained, earning a delighted gasp as Nox pressed his hand against the center of his chest, bowing to her.

“The light of all souls glows within you,” he said as he took her hand and gave it a squeeze. There was a euphoric gasp from Celia and she attempted to lower into a bow but Nox stopped her. “We’re family and if anyone should bow, it’s me. An abomination was made in my name in New Castle but you and the Sisters of Epona are blessings and more like what I’d hoped for.”

A disgusted grimace twisted Celia’s face. “That much evil would never please the Dagda. Not thegoodgod. Not the god of light and love and learning.”

“Indeed,” Nox said warmly but Tony spluttered, baffled and frustrated by how easily they had glossed over the fact that he didn’t have a father.

“Hold on! Can we take a few steps back?” he requested. “I’m still stuck on the part wheremy entire life was a lie.Not just this business with Nox and the Dagda, but my entire being as well.”

“I’m so sorry, baby.” Celia pressed her hands together. “I didn’t tell you because it was part of my oath and it wouldn’t have made sense before. But I raised you with every bit of love I had in me and I encouraged you to love the world and learning because that ishisway,” she said, nodding at Nox, then smiling at Tony. “We knew you’d be special because the boys always are. Then, when you went to Georgetown and signed up forhisclass, I knew it was a sign! And I was right! Now, my beautiful Anthony serves the good god,” she said, beaming proudly.

Nox smiled at Tony with similar affection. “That makes me sound high maintenance,” he said with a wink for Tony. “But he is my right hand and one of the best friends I’ve ever had, even if I don’t tell him as often as I should.”

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