Page 60 of Truth or Spare

“Love you, Doobie,” she said quietly, squeezing his arm as she passed.

He waited until Theo had distracted Cassie to jab a finger in Roddy’s direction. “You’re trespassing tonight. You weren’t meant to be a part of the celebration and Bryce is biting his tongue for Cassie and because he knows how much I need help. But don’t get ahead of yourself. You’re on probation and you’re starting at the bottom,” he warned.

Roddy held up his hands, nodding rapidly. “I meant what I said, I’m not here to take over. This place looks…” He sniffed hard and wiped the corner of his eye as he scanned the lanes, then smiled at Dewey. “You didn’t just hold onto it, you’ve made it even better and stronger. Dad would bethrilledif he could see what you’ve done with the place.”

“I guess. It’s pretty much the same, just had to replace a few things,” Dewey mumbled but inside, he felt like he was bursting. He often wondered what their father would say, if Dewey had done everything the way Gerry would have wanted.

“Nah! That’s new!” Roddy pointed at the mirrored wall on the other side of lane 1. “It just said Brooks on that side too, but the mirrors make it brighter and we can still see the logo on the other side. That was smart,” he said, humming as he turned then gestured at the monitors over each station. “Those look real high-end. I was in an alley over in Rochester last month and this setup is way nicer. You know how much Dad would love that.”

Dewey waved it off. “I got a deal on them.”

“Of course, you did. You were always smart about stuff like that.”

For a moment, Roddy sounded just like their father. Dewey got chills, imagining how proud their dad would be if he was standing in Roddy’s place. But Dewey didn’t need Roddy’s approval. Heknewthat their father was looking down on them from Heaven and grinning from ear-to-ear, he was so proud of Dewey for taking good care of their family and the business.

But Gerry Brooks’s greatest source of pride—and Dewey’s—was his grandson. Gerry only had a chance to hold Bryce a few times before he was taken by a stroke, but that was the happiest Dewey had ever seen the old man. And all that would have mattered to Gerry Brooks was that his first grandchild and the family business would be loved and looked after. Dewey understood that and had done his best to raise Bryce with the same values he and Roddy had been raised with.

Dewey gave Roddy an impatient look. “I did whatever I thought Dad would do.”

“I know,” Roddy chuckled raggedly. “I was too busy, running my mouth and acting like I was gonna be a star, while you were listening to Dad and learning. But it’s your turn, Doob. You helddown the fort while I wasted the best years of my life fucking off.”

“My turn?” Dewey’s face twisted. “You think I was waiting on you and that this place was stopping me from being an astronaut or starting a band? This is what I wanted, dick-for-brains. I just didn’t want it to be so damn hard all the damn time.”

That left Roddy stunned and blinking. “Right… But?—”

“No buts, Rod,” Dewey said, cutting him off. “All I’ve ever wanted was to work here and to take good care of our family. You don’t see how important this place is, what it means to the people who grew up coming here and still come here because it’s all they’ve got. It was always just a bowling alley to you. But to me and Dad and Bryce, it’s about our family and what we mean to people around here.That’swhy you came back, Roddy, even if you don’t realize it.”

“Yeah,” Roddy said weakly, with a jerky nod. “I never missed all the work and the shoes, but I missed league nights andourgames after we closed.”

Those were some of the best nights of Dewey’s life and he often ached to pull out a couple of cold six packs and play a few rounds with his dad and Roddy. It had beenyearssince Dewey had played after closing.

“I realized I was living the dream back then,” Roddy said sadly, earning a grunt of agreement from Dewey.

“You really blew it. You had a good woman, too, and she gave you a beautiful, brilliant child.”

“Fuck, don’t I know it!” Roddy shook his head, grimacing in shame. “I never got over Cass, either. There were a few women but it never worked because I was a selfish shit and they couldn’t hold a candle to her.”

“Why didn’t you come back, then?” Dewey challenged. “You had eighteen years. We sure could have used you.”

“I was scared to face you. And Bryce. I knew he wouldn’t want me back.”

“Christ!” Dewey spat and didn’t hide how disgusted he was. “You’refinallygrowing up and facing your mistakes? At your old-ass age?”

Roddy winced sheepishly. “I was also a huge fucking failure. Didn’t relish the idea of owning up to that. Everyone here knows I let you all down for nothing and I knew they’d look at me the way you just did,” he said with a nod at Dewey.

“Did it hurt?” Dewey challenged, earning a confused frown from Roddy.

“Did what hurt?”

“When I looked at you like a worthless piece of shit, just then?” Dewey snapped and Roddy grunted as he nodded, hanging his head. “But it didn’t kill you, did it?” Dewey said knowingly. “Thisright here is what you were so afraid of and it’s not that bad.”

Roddy’s head snapped up. “How do you know?”

“You’re still standing and talking to me, aren’t you? We had days here, after Dad died and when Bryce was a baby that damn near killed me, I was so scared and tired and alone. Bryce was real sick for a while and Cassie’s parents’ house burned down so it wasallon me. And I was barely hanging onto this place. The old lane machines had just about worn out and we needed a new roof. People looked at me every day like I had the answers andthatfuckin’ hurt because I didn’t have shit. But I stood my ground and did the best I could, even though Iwantedto run. I thought about it damn near every day and envied the hell out of you for leaving.”

“Why didn’t you?” Roddy asked, making Dewey chuckle and shake his head.

“Because it didn’t kill me. I’ve failed plenty of times in front of the people around here and you know what happened? Theydidn’t laugh and rub it in my face, they picked me up and thanked me for trying, Roddy. You’ll see: they’ll give you some shit for being a deadbeat, like Keith, but take your fucking lumps like a man and you’ll be fine. They’ll forget about the past and give you another chance if they know you’re sorry.”

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