Page 17 of Saul

He arched an eyebrow. “Maybe you need to relax?”

I was going to agree, but he’d already shuffled down the bed. I had a pair of jammie bottoms on that he quickly dragged off, and before I could utter one word of protest I was in his mouth.

I keened as his lips swallowed my cock and half rose from the bed, but he just hummed in approval. “Oh, mm—” Unintelligible sounds came from my throat that I tried to stifle.

Daddy let go. “No, baby, let me hear you.” So, I took him at his word and hoped the rooms were soundproof.

I could feel the pressure in my balls as they tightened, even as he tugged and rolled them in his hand, and that made my cock strain even more. I fisted my hands in the sheets to try to slow myself down. Too good. Way too good, and as he tongued my slit, I knew I was going to come. “Daddy, I’m going—”

He let go for a moment. “Can you hang on for one minute, baby?”

“Try.” It was the only word I could gasp, and he bent down, humming his approval, but then he scraped his nail on my taint and circled my hole and I was done. I felt like I exploded into his mouth, but he didn’t stop caressing and teasing me until he couldn’t wring another ounce of pleasure from my limp body. He let me go so gently, then crawled back up and turned me on my side, pulling me into his chest. It was my favorite place to be in the whole world. “You haven’t, Daddy,” I whispered, feeling his hard erection against my thigh. He just grunted and pressed a kiss on my neck.

“I bet you can’t believe how happy I am you didn’t make me go to the ER.”

Daddy’s rumbling chuckles felt nice against my back. We dozed for a while, but then I wanted to pee, and Daddy wouldn’t let me go on my own. To be honest, I was quite relieved. Now that the high of his distraction was ebbing, I felt a little shaky. “What time is it?”

Daddy picked up his phone. “A little after one.”

Was that all? I felt like it should be at least midnight, but that would mean I’d missed the family dinner. “I feel I need to see Ricky.” Daddy tilted his head, listening. “It’s his weekend and so far, pretty much anything that could go wrong has. I’m his best friend and I don’t want him to worry.” I’d seen his face before Noah talked to us. He’d looked devastated. “I didn’t tell him Istill couldn’t swim, or he would never have tried to get me into the pool, and I know Ricky. He’ll be blaming himself.”

“How about we see if they’ve eaten?” Daddy asked, bringing out his phone. I scrunched my nose up, not hungry, but nodded. Daddy texted and then he smiled. “We’re meeting them downstairs in fifteen minutes.”

Ricky cried when he saw me, and both Daddies stood awkwardly as we cuddled. “It wasn’t your fault,” I said again.

“But I should have—”

“No,” I said and put my finger over his lips to quiet him. “How many times did you and your dad save me? How many times did you feed me when I was hungry?” I pressed my forehead to his. “How many times were you my safe space?”

Ricky lifted his hand and extended his little finger. I smiled and hooked it with mine.

“Does that mean we can eat?” he said hopefully, and I giggled.

“The chicken dinosaurs are fabulous.”

We ordered and despite liking the idea of a cocktail, Daddy insisted I order my second choice of Coke. He told me my respiratory system had been suppressed enough and didn’t want to add alcohol to that mix. Something about my cough reflex. But as Ricky was drinking Coke as well, I didn’t feel too bad. We were just finishing our lunch when I heard my name, and my gaze fell on Steven.

“I thought you left,” I said. I hadn’t believed Emile would let him come back.

“No,” he said, searching my face. “I’m Chris’s best man, but Emile and I broke up when he realized I was going back with Matt and not going with him to Sunset.” His gaze didn’t waver from mine. “Please give me a couple of minutes?” He eyed the group. “In private.”

I gazed at him, not daring to look and see what Daddy’s reaction was, but then I remembered he was Christopher’s best-man and there had been enough disasters already. I’d only told Ricky that the thing that had come between us was my Little, but it wasn’t really. And anyway my Little was a big part of me, and something I couldn’t turn off. I squeezed Daddy’s hand and stood, following Steven to another table.

“Calvin, I made a huge mistake. Emile wasn’t ever right for me.” He paused. “You are.”

I stared at him in shock. “Me?” I blurted out, and he took my hand. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Daddy rise to his feet, but Chris pulled him back.

I gazed at Steven. I could have fallen in love with him so easily, but I hadn’t because I knew he could never accept who I was. “And the first time I ask for my binkie in public?” I asked, remembering Ricky. “What about if I want to try diapers?” He looked confused, and I withdrew my hand.

“But you never asked before.”

Because I never trusted you.

I wasn’t sure I wanted a binkie. I didn’t know if I wanted to try diapers. I didn’t know if I was there yet with Daddy, but I’d never been anywhere near with Steven. “I’m sorry, but the fact that I don’t feel comfortable enough to discuss either of those things with you tells me what I need to know.”

“But I was new at this,” Steven said desperately. “I took control in exactly the way you wanted. You never mentioned diapers or binkies. You never gave us a chance.”

No, he’d taken control in the opposite way I wanted. He hadn’t enforced his rules out of safety, or love or concern, simply because he expected me to do as I was ordered, and I sat back in astonishment at the revelation. Knowing I was only seeing the difference up close and personal now because of Daddy. And it was such a stark difference I wanted to smack my head. How could I have been so blind? While it was true I’d never mentioned exploring my needs, Ricky had always overshared infront of him, and Steven had never asked once what I thought or needed. But then, I hadn’t spoken up. The fact remained that I’d shown more trust in Daddy in the whole two days I’d known him than Steven in the nearly two years we’d been together. I stood. “I’m sorry,” I said simply, and walked back to our table.

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