Page 54 of Beyond Oblivion

“I want you,” she breathed. “I want you to fuck me.”

I slid my thumb into her mouth, my breath hitching as her warm lips closed around it. My eyes fluttered shut, overwhelmed by the sensation of her soft, deliberate movements. “That’s what I’m doing, baby. Just warming you up.”

“I’m past warm,” she said between labored breaths.

Prelude complete.My body moved against hers with a desperate rhythm, her moans filling the room as the bed rocked beneath us. Pausing only long enough to sit on my knees and lift her ankles to rest on my shoulders, I dug my fingers into her hips and picked up the same rhythm, pulling her to glide over me again and again. Each thrust made my dick pulse with tingling ecstasy, fracturing out like lightning through every nerve, my body the sky.

I flipped her over and climbed off the bed, planting my bare feet on the floor as I dragged her until she was bent over the edge, using my hand to guide my dick just enough that I could grab her hips and pull her to me as I sunk inside of her again.

She cried out into the mattress, grabbing a pillow in her fist. She looked back at me with a tired, impish grin. “That’s what I wanted.”

I pulled out, but before she could protest, I flipped her onto her back again, hooked my elbows under her knees, and with my hands on her shoulders, I lifted her until she was facing me, her fingers digging into the back of my neck.

I lowered her slowly, my cock easily encompassed by her wet and silky pink skin. She moaned against my cheek as I filled every inch of her, and then she pressed her cheek firmly against mine as I began bouncing her ass against my hips. My biceps began to burn as I lifted and lowered her over and over, but the sounds she made in my ear made the pain easy to ignore.

I knew she was thinking the same thing I was; it had been far too long since I’d had her in the air, helpless as I fucked her as fast or as slow as I wanted, keeping her right on the edge. After listening to her come for years, the slight change in the pitch as she begged told me she was close, so I let her fall onto her back, flipped her over again, and then reached around, rubbing small circles against her clit as I picked up the pace.

Coming at the same time was always the goal, and just as I felt her insides tighten and overwhelm me, my entire body began to tense and then release, causing a chain reaction I had no control over. With my free hand, I reached under her arm and grabbed her shoulder from beneath, pulling her against me, groaning through clenched teeth.

After a few moments, our labored breathing the only sounds, I stood and massaged my fingers into the muscles of her back, kneading the tension away while still inside her. “Good girl.”

She exhaled with absolute contentment. “Best. Husband. Ever.”

“Did you get what you wanted?”

All she could manage was an almost imperceivable nod against the mattress, her arms splayed on each side of her, her hands in weak fists.

She complained when I finally disengaged, settling onto her side of the bed as I fetched the towel she’d used after her shower. I handed it to her, noting the longing in her eyes was still there, but it was different. She didn’t say anything as she used the towel and handed it back, and she was still quiet when I put it in the hamper and returned to the bed, not making a sound even when I pulled her into my arms. The silence between us wasn’t cold, but it was fragile, like one wrong word would shatter the last thirty minutes.

She looked back at me with a mix of emotions only I could read—the conflict of satisfaction, love, sadness, and a little bit of guilt.

I swallowed hard, not sure what to say. What words would reassure her that it was okay to default back to the hope that this time would be the miracle we both so desperately wanted?

Camille nodded, understanding that we both felt the same deep, aching feeling in our chests. Raegan and Wesley, last I’d heard, weren’t even trying. It could’ve been as simple as a flippant conversation over lunch about getting off birth control, and now they were expecting a child. It wasn’t fair, and that thought sent a wave of guilt through every inch of my soul. We were still happy for everyone who seemed to so easily achieve what we couldn’t, and yet the sting of it made it feel difficult to breathe.

“It’s okay,” I said, hugging her to me. “I’m hoping this was it, too.”

She nodded and looked away, relaxing her head into the warmth of my arm. She wiped away a tear with the back of her hand and exhaled. I tried to balance being strong and bearing the weight of our struggle with her, but sometimes comfort was just too far for words to reach.

The next morning, words didn’t come any easier. Camille stood at the kitchen island, absentmindedly rubbing her fingers along the smooth edge of her coffee mug.

I cupped my hands on her hips and kissed the back of her hair. “This is the part where I start to get nervous. Those old conversations pop up in my mind where you talk about leaving.”

She turned to face me. “I know. I know, and I’m sorry I ever said it. It was stupid, and I can see the worry on your face every time we hear someone we know is expecting. I’m not going to lie to you; those thoughts still creep in, but I fight with them every time and win.”

I kissed her forehead, looking up at the ceiling fan in the living room slowly turning, trying to focus on something else so I didn’t revert back into the old version of me who’d lose his shit at the mere thought of losing the love of my life.

“It just feels like everyone around us is moving forward with their lives, and we’re just… stuck,” she said.

The pain in her voice sliced through me. I pulled back just enough to look down into her eyes. “Being stuck with you is the best possible scenario,” I said. “You’re more than enough for me.”

“I just hate dragging you through this.”

“Cami…” I warned, my heart beating faster. “Don’t. Don’t start with theyou didn’t sign up for thistalk. I signed up for you—just you. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. Anything else would just be a bonus.”

“No, that’s not what I mean,” she sighed, setting down her mug. “If it’s just us, it’s enough.”

I frowned, dubious.

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