Page 92 of What We Broke

Raine: We’re ready.

Hours had passedsince we left the house, not wanting to be waiting around idly while they packed and painted the room. Since Zara ended up going out, Leo and I ended up watching television and talking together at her place while we waited to receive that text from Raine.

Now we’re driving the short distance to our place and the nerves are settling in.

There isn’t any real expectation on what it would look like, but trying to anticipate our reaction to the door being opened takes quite a large amount of mental energy.

Parking in the driveway, I’m not surprised that neither Leo nor I can manage to open our doors.

“We can do this,” I coax.

“Can we?” Leo says. “Because it kind of feels like we can’t.”

I grab his hand and thread my fingers through his. “I love you, Leo.”

“I love you too,” he replies, raising our hands to his lips to kiss.

“Highs and lows,” I say.

“Highs and lows.”

I open my door first and then Leo follows. When we enter the house, Julian is stacking boxes in the living room. They’re all labeled and positioned according to sizing.

It’s less of a punch to the gut than I thought, but knowing what Leo and I have planned to do with all her things comforts me in more ways than one.

Julian looks up at the door as we walk in. “Hey. Deacon and Raine are just adding some final touches. Let me tell them you’re here.”

“Julian,” Leo calls out, and Julian glances over his shoulder. “Thank you.”

“Of course.”

Leo slides his hands around my middle just as Raine walks out of the room and toward us. Her hair is sitting on top of her head and she’s got paint streaks everywhere.

“Have a good time?” I ask.

The size of the smile transforms her face, but neither Leo nor I miss the unshed tears pooling in her eyes.

“Raine, babe.” Leo drops his hands and she comes running into my arms.

“I just hope she likes it,” she croaks out. “I didn’t get to be a big sister, so I really hope she likes it.”

“Of course she will,” Leo says, wrapping his arms around us.

“Oh shit, sorry.” Deacon’s voice cuts through our moment. “We were just going to leave. We figured we would give you some privacy.”

“Wait,” I say. I kiss Raine on the top of her head. “Gimme a sec, babe.” I turn to Deacon. “Leo and I wanted to talk to you about something.”

I usher all of us to the living room, but Deacon declines sitting down so as not to get paint on the couch. So I stay standing, while Leo, Julian, and Raine sit.

I clear my throat. “Leo and I were discussing Lola’s things. Everything is brand new and gender neutral.” I glance at Raine. “Thanks to our daughter. And…”

The words get lodged in my throat. And my tongue refuses to work. I feel Leo’s hand slide into mine, squeezing it.

“We would love for you two to have all of it,” Leo says, his voice thick with emotion. “You’re on your own surrogacy journey and we cannot wait for you two to welcome a brand new baby into your family.”

Managing to compose myself, I add, “You both have done so much for us, and it would mean the world to know things we didn’t get to use for our baby girl will go to another baby who will be so loved.”

“Jesse,” Deacon says, on an exhale. “Man, I can’t...” He looks between the three of us and then back at Julian, whose tears freely run down his face. “Thank you.”

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