Page 61 of What We Broke

leo

NOW

“Is that a hickey on your neck?”Gio asks.

I reach for the almost faded bruise but ignore his question.

“Leo,” he says, as if I didn’t hear him. “I know you’re not out there sleeping with anyone else.”

“What do you mean?” I deadpan. “Don’t I look like the type of guy who will cheat on his husband while their marriage is in crisis?”

“Okayyy then,” Gio says more to himself than me. “Anything you want to talk about?”

“I need a job,” I say, moving away from anything remotely close to hickey talk.

Gio and I are sitting across from one another at the coffee shop right next door to the physical therapy clinic he owns. We’ve already finished lunch and now we’re just sipping our coffees. Like the good best friend he is, Gio asks me almost daily to join him for lunch, making sure I know that I have someone to turn to and some place to land, if I need.

And so many times I did, and Gio is always there.

I owed the people in my life more than I could ever repay, especially Gio and especially in the last twelve months.

So, when the mornings weren’t too hard, I pushed myself to leave the house and see him. It isn’t easy and I’m not really good at it, but between the unemployment, the DUI charges, and everything else in between, I’m coming to terms with the fact that things need to change.

Ineed to change.

“A job is great, but what about that hickey?” Gio persists.

I shrug nonchalantly. “Don’t act so surprised. Who do you think I got it from?”

“Did you have sex?” he asks.

There is nothing but genuine curiosity in his question, but it’s too difficult for me to answer, because Jesse and I didn’t just have sex.

What happened that night felt almost sacred. Like a secret. In seven years I had never seen my husband unravel the way he did that night.

I’ve seen him happy, I’ve seen him angry, I’ve seen him sad, I’ve seen him grieving. I’ve seen him in all the ways one could see the one they love, but I had never seen him spiral.

And I wasn’t prepared for the way it made me feel.

He is my rock, and my rock is cracking, and it’s all my fault.

“Earth to Leo.” Gio waves his hands in front of my face. “Where’d you go just now?”

“Nowhere,” I answer absently. “Now. A job. You got any ideas?”

This time Gio raises a knowing eyebrow at me but follows the conversation change nonetheless. “For the millionth time,” he says, “you could just work with me.”

“You meanforyou,” I argue.

“Is it that big of a deal?”

“No.” I reach for my large coffee that sits between us. “But you’re a physical therapist and there is absolutely nothing in your line of work that I am remotely qualified for.”

“And?”

“And,” I repeat. “I know you. You’ll end up creating a whole new role that is completely irrelevant, just so I can work there. It’s too much.”

“It doesn’t have to be permanent,” he presses. “Just until you find something that suits you right now.”

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