Page 85 of Unwanted

Years of repressed anger, hurt, and betrayal roll down my cheeks as I finally tell Arlo Bishop the truth about why I left.

“You were careless,” I say hoarsely. “With your life and our love. You were careless, and I was petrified of losing you.”

“So I left,” I say quietly. “Like a coward, I told myself it was because I wanted you to get clean foryou, but I left to protect myself. To protect my heart. Hoping and praying I never received a phone call telling me you were dead. Because there is no world I want to live in in which I have to exist without you.”

My clenched hands throb and I realize how tightly I’ve been holding him. I slowly unfurl my fingers and place my palms on his chest, my wet gaze stuck to his.

“When I thought it was you, it wasn’t disappointment or hurt or betrayal.” I swipe my thumb across his tear-stained cheeks. “For that split second I thought it was you, it was fear I felt. Sadness. I was mourning. Mourning the life we could have had. The life we would no longergetto have. And the life I would be left to live, because I’m not leaving this time.”

I wipe my own tears at the same time the elevator doors open. “I love you, Arlo Bishop. Always have. Always will.”

29

ARLO

It pained me to walk away from Frankie, but I think we both needed the space. No matter how much time has passed, tonight brought all those ugly feelings right back to the surface, for the both of us.

I needed to think.

I needed to process.

I needed to help Rhys.

As his room comes into view, I see Lennox and Samuel seated right outside the door. When their gazes land on me, they rise to their feet, exhaustion pouring out of both of them.

Before I get the chance to ask any questions Lennox speaks first. “He doesn’t want to see anyone but you.”

Feeling both pained and privileged, I wordlessly give them both a quick nod and make my way into his room.

Just like I remembered, the air is cold and sterile. But instead of me lying in the bed this time, it’s someone I’ve grown to care about a lot.

It’s someone my family has grown to care about.

For the first time, I see it from Frankie’s perspective. I imagine how dim the world would be without Rhys.

How dim Lennox and Samuel’s lives would be without Rhys.

Sitting down beside him, I take in his appearance. His pale skin, his bruised looking eyes and frail looking body.

I think back to the last time I saw him and kick myself for not pushing him to talk to me.

“What did you do?” I whisper.

His head lolls to the side, his eyes only managing to open to slits. “I’m so sorry,” he chokes out. “I’m so, so sorry.”

I scoot the chair closer to him and grab his hand. “Hey, hey. No apologies needed. We just want you to be okay.”

At the mention of more than one person, his unshed tears fall. “I can’t let them see me like this.”

His voice is pained and scratchy, so I search for the nurse call button, hoping someone can get him some water.

“They want to be here for you,” I tell him. “We all do.”

He shakes his head as sobs rack his body.

“I did this once too, you know? Lennox doesn’t know. Neither does Clem or Remy. They were too young and it was too much to burden them with.

“I don’t think I wanted to die,” I confess. “But I know I didn’t really care about living either.

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