Page 70 of Rectify

She looks from me to the hospital entrance and back. “You can't. Jagger’s in there.”

Old and new anger starts to boil underneath the surface of my skin. “I don't give a fuck if Jesus himself is in there. I'm coming. For. You.”

“Jay, please,” she begs. “Please just go home.”

The words slice through me. The person who just cried about a fucking cake and me moving back to Melbourne nowhere to be found.

“Are you kidding me right now?”

“I'm sorry Jay. I really am, but I have to go.”

The car door slams, and I pound on the steering wheel in frustration. From the corner of my eye I catch Sasha sobbing at the elevator doors, and I ache at her sadness.

Fuck. I can't leave her like that.

17

Sasha

Thank fuck the elevator is empty. I stare at my reflection, wiping away my tears, trying to make myself look more like a mum, and less like a mess.

Jay and I were having such a good night, and I just ruined it. I saw it the second the words left my mouth. The flinch. The hurt. The anger.

So much anger.

I didn’t know what else to do. If Jagger and Hendrix find out, it puts an expiration date on us. And I’m not ready for that.

The doors open, and I walk out into a colourful waiting room. Pulling my phone out of my bag, I tap the screen, and call Jagger.

“Hey, I’m right in front of the elevator, where are you?”

“Stay there. I’ll come and get you.”

I tear at my cuticles while I wait for Jagger to find me. He texted on the way here, saying she was in surgery, and not to worry because they caught it just in time. I google the symptoms of appendicitis, and wonder if I should’ve noticed it earlier.

The sound of footsteps and hushed voices get closer urging me to look up. My body freezes at the sight of not only Jagger and Emerson, but Hendrix and Taylah.

Their eyes widen in surprise and I can’t work out why, until I look down and remember what I’m wearing.

My date.

Jay.

Hurt is replaced by panic, as the four of them get closer. “She’s okay right? You said she’s safe and in surgery.”

“She’s fine now that they’re taking it out.”

Expecting to feel relieved, my body does the complete opposite, and all the emotions from this evening overflow and come out in a garbled sob.

“Hey. Hey, what’s up?” Jagger pulls me in for a hug. “She’s going to be fine.”

“I know,” I cry into his chest. “But I saw the four of you, and immediately thought the worst.”

“I should’ve warned you, but they came over for dinner tonight, and you know there’s no way he’s not coming to the hospital if she's here.”

Nodding, I peek a glance at Hendrix and Taylah. They’re wrapped up in each other, without a care in the world and a tsunami of jealousy runs through me.

Why can’t I have that?