Page 94 of Tattered Edges

That wasn’t at all how I planned on telling him, but the words fell right out of my mouth. I needed to get them out of me. I needed him to know the truth—and I needed to know if he’d catch me.

He stared at me for a long moment, his face giving away nothing before he asked, “Are you sure?”

Suddenly assaulted with the urge to cry again, I didn’t respond verbally. Rather, I clamped my lips closed tight and nodded as I tried to blink away my tears.

“Oh, sweetheart, please don’t cry. It cripples me.”

A sob crawled its way up my throat, the thought of everything falling apart right then causing me to panic all over again.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I let this happen.”

“Sawyer…” It was all he said before he was across the threshold, pulling me into his arms. He pressed his lips into my hair and mumbled, “This isn’t your fault, darling. It takes two. I’m just as culpable.”

“But now everything will be different. I didn’t want it to be this way. I wanted us to have a chance—I wanted us to be together because that’s what we wanted, not because we got stuck that way. And now there’s this. All this pressure that changes everything. And it makes me feel so selfish, but I can’t help it. Damnit! I’m not ready for this. I’m going to be a terrible mother.”

“Sawyer,” he called as he took hold of my arms and pushed us apart. His grip tightened, the crease in the middle of his brow appeared, and he continued, “That’s not even the slightest bit true.”

“Which part?” I hiccupped.

“All of it—but especially the latter part. You are unequivocally the sweetest person I know. You won’t be a terrible mother, and you won’t be doing it alone, either.”

“I don’t understand,” I muttered, shaking my head in confusion, the act sending fresh tears racing down my cheeks. “How are you so calm about all of this? Why aren’t you freaking out?”

A small smile pulled at his lips before he replied, “I’m better at hiding it than you are. Believe me when I tell you, the thought of becoming a father might be the scariest reality I’ve ever considered—but the thought of having a child withyoudoesn’t scare me at all.”

“What?” I breathed.

“I was content with my life as it was, until I met you. Now that I have you, I’m sure it would make me a fool to let you go. I have no intention of letting this make me second guess what it is I want.

“And for the record, I loved you before I knocked on that door. If we’re to be parents, then so be it—but I’m not stuck. I’ve already made my choice.”

He said it so matter-of-factly I had to replay it in my mind a few times before it sunk in.

“You—you love me?” I managed on a whisper.

Rory let go of my arms, took a step toward me, and gently grabbed hold of my face. As he grazed his thumbs across my cheeks, wiping away my tear streaks, he said, “Here’s what I know about time. A lot can happen in a little of it, or very little can happen in the span of a lot. It’s arbitrary.

“We’re still at the beginning of us, but you’ve shown me who you are. You’re mine. You said so yourself.”

I had said that.

I’d meant it, too.

Then and now.

I was enough. To Rory, I was enough.

He’d stolen my heart with that declaration.

No. That wasn’t exactly right.

I’d let him claim my body—but what I was really giving away that night was my heart. Not just bits and pieces of it, but all of it.

His declaration was a promise safeguarding my offering.

I loved him then as I loved him now, I just wasn’t ready to admit it. Not even to myself.

I pressed up onto my toes as I reached for him. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I buried my face in his neck and held on tight. He held me, too, and for the first time all day, it felt like maybe everything would be okay.

---