Page 96 of Passed Ball

I want to hold onto these moments--both the tiny baby who's growing too fast and the bond building between them. This time I don't get to take a picture, because Vivi hears my footsteps and lifts her head, still chatting animatedly about Tenley.

"Am I interrupting girl time? We can reschedule brunch if you want me to . . ." I thumb over my shoulder towards the front door.

Vivienne's hearty laugh erases any lingering annoyance from my text with Collin.

"Cuteandfunny." She's not talking to me, instead keeping her focus on my daughter. "You ready to brunch it up, my girl?"

My girl.

Yeah, I like that.

Logically, I know she doesn't mean it in a permanent way. But hearing Vivienne say it unexpectedly starts to mend cracks in my soul. When everything on our list is checked off, there's a chance I'll be left broken again.

But for now, she's exactly what I need and I know it's the same for her. She told me at the start of this that she was using me, but that's not true. We're willingly giving each other what we need most: friendship--a person who sees us for who we are without trying to change a damn thing.

"Her bag is packed. I hope that's okay. You can double check it." Vivienne rises from where she's sprawled, bringing Holland with her.

This damn girl, always doing more than she needs to. At this point, I'm pretty sure it's a compulsion.

"Vi. You didn't have to do that. I don't need you to manage my life."

"But I wanted to help."

"Wanted to or felt obligated to? There's a difference," I remind her.

She crosses the room, carefully stepping over the baby toys scattered across the floor. "Is this you trying to protect me from myself?"

Shit. Yes, that's exactly what I'm doing. Instead of admitting as much, I ask. "Do I need to?"

"Sometimes," she admits. "But you're one of the few people in my life that's never made me feel like I have to do something. And that's an elite list to be on, so you should feel special."

"Oh, I do," I say, twisting a strand of hair around my finger.

"I packed her diaper bag because I really want that eggs Benedict. And I really want to see myfriends. Not because I feel like I need to. You're a capable dad--which I told you earlier. I knew you could and would do it, but it was faster if I did it."

"Okay, then. Just making sure." I release her, turning to grab the bag.

"Hey, Xavier," she says to my back.

I hitch the backpack over my shoulder. "Yeah, sweetheart?" Her vivid green irises double at the casual use of endearment outside the bedroom.

"Thank you for looking out for me. I can be my own worst enemy."

"Aren't we all?" I agree.

Chapter 41

Vivienne

My nonna had lots of sayings about the power of gathering for a meal around a table. But her favorite was, "Around the table, all hearts are nourished." Maybe I was too caught up in my own shit, or too young to understand it, but looking around this table, empty plates pushed back, I think it's finally sinking in. There's more love here than there is in some homes, and this is as much a family as those by blood.

Like it's done most of the last hour, my gaze flits to the man next to me and then to the baby in Lilah's arms. Xavier had a shitty childhood. He grew up in a house filled with the kind of resentment no one should have to endure. Yet, he's building a beautiful life for him and his daughter and it all starts right here.

Poppy drops her hand to Lilah's bump, rubbing it and smiling, before snatching Holland from her.

"I need the baby. Planning a wedding is stressful," she justifies, booping Holland's nose softly. "She's a human Xanax."

"What's stressing you out? We can try to help," I offer.

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