Page 67 of Passed Ball

"Is it really that obvious?"

My four closest friends stare back at me, blankly.

"You had a photoshoot with her and your daughter in front of a stadium full of fans." Hendrix deadpans. "So yeah, it's obvious."

"Not to mention I caught you leaving her office," Dean adds.

"Yeah, okay," I admit defeat taking over. "Fuck, I don't even know where to start."

I look around the table. Each of these guys has had to navigate some sort of force trying to keep them from their girl to find happiness. In comparison, my problem seems silly.

The server comes up to take our drink order. When she walks away I say, "Vivi and I are hooking up. It's not serious, but I like her. She's cool and we've become friends, but neither of us are interested in a relationship." I pause before continuing. "This wasn't supposed to be complicated, because my life is crazy enough. But the more time I spend with her the more I want--the more I overthink every little thing. We made rules so this wouldn't happen, but the rules didn't stop her from getting under my skin."

They laugh.Allfour of them.Loudly.

"You guys are assholes."

Cruz is the only one who looks even a little sorry.

"You can't fuck a girl like Vivi and not catch feelings," Dom says.

I glare at him and he smirks. He's lucky there's a table separating us.

"Explain to me why catching feelings for Vivi would be so bad."

Everyone looks at Dean. No one expected him to speak up a second time.

"When you say it like that, I sound like an asshole. But it's got nothing to do with her. She's . . . Vivienne is incredible, but there's no room in my life for more. I've got Holland and I've got baseball. That's all I can manage."

Dean shakes his head. "Good luck, kid."

He may as well have called me an idiot with the way the sarcasm drips from the moniker.

"Are you sure this doesn't have anything to do with your dad?" Cruz asks.

The waitress chooses that exact moment to bring us our drinks--four beers and my water.

Dom glances from his beer to my water, his face going serious. "You're nothing like him, Xavier. You know that, right?"

The sentiment hits me harder than I expect. "I know, but that doesn't mean ignoring the lessons his example taught me. My daughter will never have to face the things I did because I'll always put her first."

"And each of us admires you for that, but we don't want to see you pass up something good in your life out of fear."

"You're not waiting for Kristy to come back so you can try to be a family for Holland, are you?" Hendrix asks, covering all the bases. Damn, I have a lot of fucking baggage.

"Fuck no," I practically growl. "If Kristy wants to be a mother to Holland, I'll co-parent with her. But our relationship was a train wreck from the beginning, and I have no interest in putting my daughter through that."

"You still haven't heard from her?" Hendrix asks, sounding nearly as angry as me. His mom left him and Mia, never looking back and leaving him to be raised by his grandmother.

I run my tongue along my teeth, shaking my head. "Unfortunately, I think it's going to come down to my lawyer tracking her down to file for full custody and eventually relinquishing her rights." I'd much rather talk about the current woman in my life. "And things with Vivi are good, but we set boundaries and in trying to respect those I'm overthinking things."

"So . . . why are you talking to us about this?" Dean sighs.

"He's right," Hendrix adds. "Talk to Vivi. Whatever you're doubting, just ask. What's the worst that could happen?"

"Things could get weird and I could lose her friendship. I don't want that," I say.

"Or you could come out of it with another person that cares about you and your daughter. Delilah and I talked all the time when I was on the road, even before we got together."

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