Page 109 of Passed Ball

It takes me a minute to get it under control and when I do he kisses me sweetly. The strawberry and the way he's brought this all back to dirty filthy fun after something so incredibly intimate settles the nerves that were starting to work their way in, wondering what this all means.

"Let's go. I'm cleaning you up then fucking you again before we shower. You're mine for every waking second between now and when I leave again." The mention of his upcoming ten game road trip has my heart sinking. But it doesn't last long because next thing I know I'm soaring--literally. The man scoops me up bridal style and carries me to his massive shower where he makes good on his promise.

Chapter 46

Vivienne

Looking at the pile of clothes laid out on my bed, I feel every bit the chaos monster I look like. My hair is still in heatless curlers and under-eye masks are perched high on my cheek bones--but there's a good reason.

My annual spiral is starting.

It's like this every year before I go home, but I've decided it's time that I finally put the past behind me and talk to my parents. I thought what I was doing was working because I'm successful and content. But spending time with Xavier has shown me that running from this has actually kept me from moving on at all.

It's kept me at arm's length from anyone but Tenley and Harlowe. My work is fulfilling, but beyond that there's been nothing meaningful in my life. And that's not a life I'm satisfied with anymore.

But before I can overcome my past I need to pack this damn suitcase and I suddenly hate everything I own.

My phone, which is propped up on my shelf playing music, rings through with a FaceTime request. Harlowe's face pops up and I quickly answer it.

"You're falling apart already, aren't you?"

"Can you blame me? Look at this mess." I flip the camera and pan over the bed. "I can't wear any of this to HarvestFest."

"I mean you could," she says slowly.

Flipping the camera back to my face, I let her see my eye roll so she knows how much I hate her point. "This is my armor. I need to feel good and none of this is going to do that."

"Babe.Youare your own armor. But I get it, I know how much coming home stresses you out. So how about this . . . I'll pick you up from the airport as planned but we make an afternoon out of it, grab drinks, and find something that makes that ass look even better than it already does before we take you back to the promised land."

"Yeah?"

"Of course. I took four days off to spend time with you. Did you think I was going to dump you on the doorstep and disappear?"

"I mean . . . you're staying with me . . . so no. But this is why you're my person. I love you, Harlowe Jean, say you'll marry me."

"And how would that make Ginger Daddy feel if I stole you away for our own happily ever after?"

No one can pick me up when I'm down like Harlowe. "First, my happily ever after was always going to include you. Second, a situationship is a long way from getting a happily ever after together.."

"Fun Fact: you don't blink when you lie."

This is the problem with a best friend that knows you better than anyone else: they call you on all your bullshit. "Maybe I'm lying about the first part," I deflect--or try to. It works about as well as I'd expect.

Harlowe tips her head back and laughs. "Fat fucking chance. You're so stuck with me. I'd stalk you if you tried to cut me out."

"Don't tempt me with a good time."

There's a mock gasp from her. "I didn't know you had a primal kink. Are you going to make Xavier chase you through the Rockies? Oh, is that on your list?"

"No. That sounds exhausting," I tell her honestly. "The only cardio I'm interested in is riding--him or my stationary bike, but mostly him."

"Now, see, that time you blinked."

I hum. "I'll never lie about how good it is with him."

"You hear yourself, right?" My friend smiles knowingly from where she's sprawled across her worn couch.

"Yes, and it's so fucking confusing. The things that come out of my mouth and the things inside . . ." I wrap my knuckles on the side of my head. "It's normally such a good brain, and I'm so proud of it, but lately it's been betraying me."

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