Page 36 of Devil's Doom

“She loves you, you know?” he says out of the blue, a strange tenderness in his tired eyes. “She wants you to stay. With us. Maybe get a house together. Share a life.”

His confession makes me happy at first. I love Rada, too, and I don’t know what kind of love it is, only that I want to be by her side, look at her face, and protect her from evil. Being always with her sounds like a dream—only a dream, because it’s not real.

My destiny will find me one day and turn all dreams into dust.

Defeated, I sigh heavily, forcing myself to smile. “Goodnight, Lech.”

I put away the glass and turn to leave, but before I reach the door, the emotions of the evening catch up with me. I shake, snorting with laughter, my hand over my mouth to muffle the sound. Lech comes over and turns me by the shoulders with a concerned look.

“You should have… seen his face…” I blurt out between bursts of silent giggles, my stomach hurting from laughter. “He was… terrified… disgusted… Mighty dragon… He fucking puked, Lech…”

He laughs, too, his forearm braced on the door next to my head. We both shake, gasping in muffled giggles, our breaths mingling in the small space between us. Tears stream down my face, my eye patch growing wet. Lech grins, not laughing anymore, but his eyes scrunch up with joy.

He leans closer and kisses my cheek. A moment later, his cool tongue darts out, licking up a tear.

Laughter dies in my throat, and I stare at him in wonder, without breathing, without a sound. We look at each other, his eyes so blue and clear, his face so good. I realize I could love this man, just like I love Rada. We’re already halfway there, all three of us.

Lech leans in to kiss my other cheek, and I turn my face away with a shaky breath. His lips land on my ear instead. He pauses for a moment before pulling back.

“I can’t,” I choke out.

Because I’m a lie. They think I’m Alina, a one-eyed woman who is some sort of bies and can boil seven eggs a day, but this person doesn’t exist. I am Jaga, a mortal woman who lives on borrowed time, because one day, Woland will find me and slaughter everyone I love.

I can’t let it happen to them. I can’t.

“Of course,” Lech says, his breath hot in my hair. “I understand.”

He pulls away. I don’t look at him as I slink out of the room, gently closing the door behind me. In the bar room, mamunas get drunk on vodka, sounds of revelry drifting up the stairs. I lean my back against the crimson door and weep for all my lost loves and everything I can’t have.

I live a lie, and I’ve fooled myself, too. Friendship seduced me into a false sense of security, but everything that happened today showed me how stupid I was to think I could have it.

I can’t truly protect and care for those I love if I spend my life afraid of being found. Today, my priority should have been protecting Rada, but I focused on avoiding Foss. I almost let her get hurt.

With a heavy heart, I trudge down the corridor to my emerald door. That’s when it happens. The sounds from below grow muffled, and the air sizzles with tension that grows and grows until it breaks. A toll rolls through Slawa, the second today. It tears my magic out of my chest, and I realize with horror it took much more than before.

I fall to my knees, coughing and wheezing as I try to catch my breath. With teary, unfocused eyes, I see the crimson door swing open. Lech falls to his knees in front of me, a pale, motionless Dar in his palms.

The baby isn’t breathing.

Chapter fourteen

Law

“It’s the toll,” Lech gasps, his voice taut with pain. “Took all his magic. What do I do? Alina, what do I do?”

I stare at the baby for a moment that seems to last an eternity, but in reality is just a few seconds. He neither moves nor breathes, and that means his life is gone. His soul is gone. There is nothingtodo, because he’s dead.

That’s what I’ve been taught, what everyone believes. Breath is life. With the breath gone, life is gone, and nothing can be done.

Yet I know it’s wrong. I died once, I stopped breathing, yet my soul lingered. It lingered long enough for Woland to bring me back.

I might not be a mighty demon or a god, but I am a witch, and I don’t roll over. Not even for death.

“Stay, love,” I murmur to Dar, hoping his soul won’t flee, just like mine didn’t. “Aunty Alina will do something fun. Stay and watch, sweetheart.”

Lech sniffs when I take Dar from him and lay him gently on the floor between us. I put my palm on his chest, covering the entire area easily. I imagine his insides, the tiny but strong heart, two twin lungs, a maze of blood vessels. I hold the image in my head and infuse my palm with magic.

“Stay and watch, baby,” I whisper.

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