Page 77 of Spelunking Through Hell

He glanced up, eyes wide and, inexplicably, terrified. That terror only grew as he looked to the man standing next to me, and I finally knew something for certain, not just through the power of conjecture:

Everything I didn’t want to think about the snake man who had been my helper and guide to the universe for fifty years was true. He had beenlyingto me, intentionally steering me away from the only thing I had ever been trying to find. Whether he’d done it for the sake of the pneuma I carried back to him or out of genuine concern that I’d be trapped in the bottle and die with Thomas, I didn’t know. I also didn’t care, because he could have allowed me to make my own choices, and he hadn’t.

He never had.

“Alice,” he breathed. Then: “What’shappenedto you? You’re older—”

“Wiser, too, I hope,” I said. “Learned a lot of stuff out there. Did you know that I was carrying enough pneuma to blow a hole in the side of a bottle world after I finished a run? Or that it could be removed withoutcutting me openif someone actually cared about leaving my skin intact? Or that my husband was actually alive out there for me to find, and I hadn’t been wasting my life for the last fifty years?”

He didn’t quite recoil, but his eyes widened, very slightly, confirming my suspicions. I narrowed my own eyes, glaring at him.

“I had a family to get back to,” I said, voice low. “I had a life. You took that away by withholding information. I’m still the one who chose to go after him, but you’re the one who decided I didn’t need to know when I was going in the wrong direction. The one who decided I didn’t need to know how the universe worked.”

“She trusted you,” said Thomas, voice perfectly calm and cold as a frozen lake in February, after the thaw had weakened the ice without breaking it. “She came to you because she trusted you, and you led her astray over and over again to keep her... what? Gathering pneuma for you?”

From the way Naga glanced to the side, I knew that was the answer. “I was justlivestockto you,” I said, horrified. “You took care of me, you made sure I was fed and healthy, and you sent me out to make you richer. You did it on purpose.”

“What would you have had me do?” Naga demanded, with a faintair of desperation. “No one escaped Lemure after the world soul died! I wasprotectingyou from being trapped forever and allowing you to hold to some measure of hope that you might one day be reunited with your mate! I gave you a longer lifespan than your species is heir to, and I kept you safe.”

“Youliedto me. You hurt me and you used me and youliedto me.”

“I gave you everything you asked for.”

“You never gave me the one thing Ineeded!”

“I gave youtime.”

“You fucked with my memories!” Naga’s expression, already panicked and desperate, turned terrified. I ignored it. Stopping to acknowledge his fear would just have taken away from the momentum I was building. It’s easier to bite the hand that’s been feeding you when you’re too mad to see straight.

I took a step forward. Thomas’ hand on my wrist kept me from taking another one. I settled for glaring.

“I never gave you permission to edit what I knew,” I said. “And if I did, when I was hurt and desperate, if you asked, ‘Can I take away the things that might slow you down,’ and I agreed, it doesn’t count because you took that memory, too.” My voice dropped, going low and dangerous. “Consent has to be remembered to exist.”

“You did, though,” said Naga desperately. “You told me you wanted to be a better weapon. You said my surgeons could remove whatever they deemed necessary.”

That didn’t sound like me. Forgetting something that might make me flinch when I didn’t need to was one thing; giving carte blanche to mess with my mind was another. I started to open my mouth, to argue. Thomas squeezed my wrist, and I stilled.

“That dead, rotting world was yours before I was cast there,” said Thomas, tone still frozen. “Whose world was this?”

“The Empusai. We didn’t steal it. The original owners are still here,” said Naga. “They serve us, and we protect them.”

“Seems like you’ve been doing that a lot,” I said. “Protecting people. Did you evenaskthem?”

“We did.”

“And they serve the giant snake people who came out of nowhere and took over their world anyway?” I asked. “Because that doesn’t seem like it’s in their best interests.”

“They do it of their own free will,” said Naga.

“Is it the sort of free will that comes with forgetting they agreed to it?” I snapped. “Because it sounds like that’s your favorite tactic.”

“We’re not Johrlac!” said Naga. “You were a special case.”

“Gosh, it’s great to be special,” I said. “Fuck you.”

“Taking this world for your own was an act of violence,” said Thomas. “You transgress against my wife, and against this world.” He released my wrist, starting to step forward.

Naga slithered behind his desk, eyes bright with desperation. “I wasn’t there when Lemure fell! It happened centuries ago, and I was born here, on this world. This is my home. I stole nothing.”

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